My Heart Your Home

the value of hopekids.

2011-06-13T10:04:00.000-07:00

a kid wrote a bday card to one of the hopekids teacher: You r pretty on the outside but better in the inside.

goodness. this is also why i serve.

honour

2011-06-09T08:10:00.000-07:00

Show Honor to Your Wife

Here is a great post about honoring your wife, from the Mars Hill Blog, adapted from Mark Driscoll's sermon.

Mark Driscoll is the founder of Mars Hill Church in Seattle. Known for his sometimes harsh tone, in spite of that he is awesome, humorous and always saying it as it is, whether you want to hear it or not.

Here’s what Peter has to say In 1 Peter 3:7:

Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayer may not be hindered.
In the previous verse, 1 Peter 3:6, he said that women, when it comes to marriage are prone toward, what? Fear. Fear. And you know what? Those fears that the women have about marriage are legitimate.

Your Wife Trusts You with the Rest of Her Life

If a woman marries a man, she’s trusting him with the rest of her life that he won’t hit her, cheat on her, that he’ll work hard, that he’ll pay the bills, that he’ll love their children, that he’ll finish the race well, that he’ll walk with Jesus until the end, that if she gets sick, he’ll look after her, that if she is dying, he will be faithful to her. Gentlemen, it is a terrifying thing for a woman to trust a sinful man.

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Every man who reads this, even the best men among us, has areas of repentance and growth that are required.

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As a man, I don’t think I fully understood this until I had daughters, and now I have some understanding of that fear. The thought of taking one of my daughters and walking them down the aisle and handing them to a man and trusting that he will love them and protect them and serve them and care for them and look after them, it causes me fear and grave concern.

Don't Give Women a Reason to Fear

Women have legitimate fears, and what Peter is saying is that men need to be a particular way so those fears are alleviated. And I love his words, “in an understanding way, showing honor.” That’s a man.

Now as I say this, many of you guys will nod your head and say, “Yeah, that’s me.”

No, you’re not. So let me practically unpack this for you. Every man who reads this, even the best men among us, has areas of repentance and growth that are required. And so I want to talk to you men about some things that your woman will fear.

1. Honor Your Wife Maritally

What this means is, gentlemen, you’re not looking for a girlfriend if you are single. You’re not looking for a roommate. You’re not looking for a cohabitation partner. You’re looking for a wife. You must honor her while dating, that is when you're on your best behavior. I don’t care if you apologize, do you repent and lead? Being sorry is not enough; being Christ-like is what is necessary.

Ephesians 5:25 says, “Husbands are to love their wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” Are you selfless or selfish? Do you give yourself up for her or do you take from her?

What it is to be a one-woman man

When you get married, men, you are to be a one-woman man. That’s the requirement of an elder and that is the example for all men.

You’re not the flirt guy
You’re not the female buddies guy
You’re not the download porn guy
You’re not the “I got another gal on the side I always keep in case of emergency” guy
You’re not the wandering eye guy
If you are, you’re not honoring marriage and you’re not honoring your wife.

Don't make women fearful of men

I know some complete fools, they like to take their wedding ring off when they go out to the sports bar with the boys. Do you honor your marriage covenant? Do you take responsibility as the head of the marriage covenant, take responsibility for the well-being of the woman?

A woman has great fear. If you don’t honor marriage, she is statistically going to go into poverty upon divorce. She will become yet another single mother. She’ll have to find a way to explain to the children of why they shouldn’t be embittered against you even though you’re a loser. See, these fears are very legitimate. Women have seen this so many times that they’re fearful of men.

2. Honor Her Physically

Peter says that the woman is the “weaker vessel”. What that means is, generally speaking, if a husband and a wife get in a fist-fight, he’ll win. I’ll give you an example. Many of you have seen my wife, Grace. If we get in a fight, it’s not a fair fight. I have an 18-inch neck, she has an 18-inch waist. If someone breaks into our home, I’m not, “Go get ‘em, baby. You’re the tough one here. I’ll pray. II’ll pray imprecatory prayers in the closet.”

You know what, gentlemen? You are stronger than your woman

Do you ever hit her?
Do you ever shove her?
Do you ever push her?
Do you ever grab her, restrain her?
Do you ever raise a hand and threaten her?
Do you ever intimidate her with physical violence?
Do you give her that look, that pierced, glazed, violent, angry, don’t-push-it-now’s-a-good-time-to-shut-up look?
Do you tell her, “I’m getting very angry, you should just shut up right now. It’s gonna go bad for you”?
Do you get right in her face?
Do you intimidate her with your presence?
Shame on you. A man who picks on a woman, what a joke.

Have you ever forced yourself on a woman? You’re a rapist.

You’ll say, “She’s my wife.” You’re a rapist.

Don't hold your wife prisoner

When someone is attacked, we call it abuse. As horrible as that is, what is even worse is torment. Torment is when you’re abused and you can’t get out. This is like prisoners of war and those who are held captive in slavery. For some women, their version of slavery and captivity and torment is called marriage. Their husband is physically intimidating. She’s afraid of him. She can’t leave, at least that’s what she thinks. She feels stuck, particularly if she’s got children. Some of you guys are tormentors and abusers and rapists and husbands and Christians, and that is absolutely inexcusable.

Women, a man who hits you is in sin

Most men don’t walk around thinking about their personal safety. I know a lot of women who do. Does she feel safe with you? Ladies, if you’re dating a guy who has ever been physically violent, run for your life, run for your children’s life, run for your grandchildren’s life. If he’s ever even threatened you with violence, there is something profoundly demonic in that man. There is something sincerely wrong in that man. He will then apologize, tell you he is sorry. He will shed a few tears, say it will never happen again and he will subtly shift the blame to you. “You know when you do that, it just makes me really angry. Don’t do that again.”

“Oh, okay, it must be my fault.” It’s never your fault. It doesn’t matter what you say or do, if a man hits you, harms you, he’s in sin, no excuse.

Head-of-the-house does not mean bully

And there are some guys, some absolute block-headed idiots who think when the Bible says that you’re the head of the home, that it means you get to be the bully. There’s nothing uglier than a guy who then takes this same disposition toward his children, especially his daughters. The grossest, vilest thing is a man who hits a woman, and the man who hits a woman is willing to hit his own daughter. It’s disgusting.

3. Honor Your Wife Emotionally

Some of you say, “I’m not emotional, I don’t connect.” You should. Men and women have the same emotions; they express them in masculine and feminine ways. Your wife needs intimacy. She wants you to know her. She wants to know you. She wants you to open up. She wants you to be passionate and loving and honest, and she wants to know you and she wants to be known by you. And the Bible says that Adam was with his wife, Eve, and he, what?

He knew her.

There are too many guys that turn marriage into a job description. He does his responsibility, she does hers, and there’s no emotional connection whatsoever. Those are guys whose sins are sins of omission. “I didn’t hit her, I didn’t yell at her.” Yeah, but you didn’t love her. You didn’t connect with her. You didn’t encourage her. You didn’t pursue her.

Ultimately, you failed her.

4. Honor Her Verbally

How do you speak to her? Do you have nasty nicknames for her? Do you raise your voice? Do you threaten her? Do you give back-handed comments? Some of you guys would say, “I would never hit a woman.” How about with your tongue?

When you wife is not there and you’re with the boys, how do you speak of her? What do you say about her?

Dont' put your children in the middle

You know what? Your children will pick this up as well.

You start saying horrible things about your wife, and the children will be left in this horrible position of choosing between their mother and father and invariably some of the children will despise their own mother and speak evil of her in an effort to remain loyal to their father.

A division in a marriage includes the children, they’re stuck in the middle. They’re casualties of the war.

If I close my eyes, no one can see me

You men could defuse this and take away this fear by honoring her verbally. Speaking honestly, respectfully, lovingly to her and about her. Some of you guys forget. You say, “Well, Jesus isn’t there. My wife isn’t there. I get to say whatever I want.” No, Jesus is there even when your wife’s not there. God sees everything. God knows everything, and you’re not getting away with anything.

5. Honor Your Wife Financially

“If a man does not provide for the needs of his family, he’s denied the faith and worse than an unbeliever” (1 Timothy 5:8).

In Genesis, the woman’s curse was her children and submitting to her husband. The man’s curse was providing for his family. And what the weakest, most impish, worthless men among us do is, “Oh, my load is heavy. I know yours is heavy, but I need you to carry half of mine too.”

Men, you have to work

You've got to work hard. You’ve got to out-work the other men if you want to feed your family. That’s your responsibility as a man. If you want any men to respect you, if you want your wife to respect you, if you want your children to respect you, you pay the bills. You make the money, you feed the family.

We live in this day where there are guys telling their wives,

“Hey, birth control, abortion”
“We can’t have kids”
“You make too much money”
“I don’t like responsibility.”
Shame on you.

Your wife has a maternal duty to fulfill

There’s nothing sadder than a woman who loves Jesus and wants to be a mom, and the husband keeps saying, “I’m the head of the home, no.” What he’s saying is “I’m in charge and I command you to sin, to deny all of your maternal instincts." Titus 2 says, “The woman should be homeward in her orientation.”

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We’re a culture that is working hard to protect women and children, and no one has the common sense to beat on the guys who are the cause of so much of the pain.

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And I know that some of you guys are going to say, “Oh, but this is outdated.” Yes, and I would say look at the condition of marriages and families in our culture and ask if it’s working.

The latest statistics indicate 40 percent of all children are born out of wedlock. It is now at the point where women aren’t even pretending they’re going to ever get married.

They go to college, get a good job, get pregnant, have a kid. They’ve lost any hope of ever finding a guy who can actually carry the load, and that’s tragic. We’re a culture that is working hard to protect women and children, and no one has the common sense to beat on the guys who are the cause of so much of the pain.

Be generous with your wife

I know guys as well, they’re not generous. I know one guy, he’s such an idiot. This guy makes decent money and he’s totally chintzy with his wife. She gets no spending money, can’t go out to coffee with the girls because he’s a total control freak and tightwad. Be honoring of your wife financially. I’m not saying you have to live at a lavish and high level. But what I am saying is live within your means, you make a budget, you tithe, spend, save, invest well. I know it’s hard to live on one income. I know it’s particularly difficult in this economic climate, but for some of you boys, it’s a built-in excuse to be irresponsible.

Run the numbers rather assuming you need a second income

Statistically, if you have children, and put them in day care so mom can work, the other costs that are associated: eating out, take-out, dry cleaning, car, second phone, cell phone, things of that nature, plus the increased tax breaks and costs and burdens very rarely contribute anything to the bottom line of the family. The taxes alone eat a huge portion of it.

MSNBC did a big study on this years ago and they brought the data to the mothers who dropped their kids off at the day care. “You’re providing nothing to the income of the family,” and the women are bawling, having a nervous breakdown on television, saying, “Well, then why am I even going to work?”

Because that guy doesn’t know how to run numbers on taxes. He’s not smart enough to find somebody to figure it out for him. He just says, “Put the kids in day care, get a job, shoulder half of my curse. Oh and by the way, I forgot to run the numbers, come to find it’s not really helping.”

Honor her financially.

6. Honor Her Practically

With some guys, the house is a wreck. It’s never finished, the furniture’s broken, the car hardly starts, they live far away from community, they don’t have a schedule, they don’t have a budget, they don’t have a plan, the wife doesn’t know what’s going on.

Honor her practically. Do you have a budget? Do you have a schedule? Do you have an integrated plan? Do you have a life?

7. Honor Her Parentally

Gentlemen, your wife wants you to love the kids. She wants you to help raise them. She wants you to love them, to pursue them. She wants you to get guy time with your sons. She wants you to get daddy dates with your daughters. She wants you to do Ephesians 6 and be their pastor. She wants you to read the Bible with them. She wants you to pray with them. And you know what? You should want that too.

Do your job

So many guys who are Christians think “I pay for Christian school, I send the wife and kids to the Christian church. I’ve done my Christian duty.” No, you’ve abdicated your responsibility to others. It’s your job to love your kids. It’s your job to pray with your kids. It’s your job to teach the Bible to your kids. It’s your job to encourage your kids. It’s your job to discipline your kids.

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Christian, husband, father, employee. Those are your first four duties; it’ll take most of your life. You’re not going to have a lot of time.

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A wife will be so forgiving of so many things if she actually knows her husband desperately loves their children, that he serves them, that he cares for them, that he’s tender with them, that he’s Pastor Dad for them. So few children actually have a father. So few of those actually have a Christian father and how few of those actually have a dad who’s doing his job.

And I’ll tell you what, guys, this is not something you have to do; it’s something you get to do.

This is wonderful. Every night, my daughter Alexie, blond hair, blue eyes and looks like Tinkerbell says, “Poppa Daddy, I need a piggyback ride and a Bible story.” You know what? I do too. I need that as much as Alexie. I weep thinking of the day that I’m not going to be giving her piggyback rides, so I give her as many piggyback rides as I can because it’s a great season and a wonderful opportunity.

Honor your priorities

What this means, gentlemen, is your priorities will be Christian, husband, father, employee. Those are your first four duties; it’ll take most of your life. You’re not gonna have a lot of time. You're probably gonna need to put down your tools, your hobbies, your car, your projects, your golf clubs, your Xbox and probably going to need to put down the remote control, and your laptop, and your iPod to honor your wife parentally. You’re not going to have a lot of time for a lot of other things.

Gentlemen, your goal is not to stand before God and tell him what level you got to on “World of Warcraft”.

8. Honor Her Spiritually

All of this comes down to this point.

There are between 11 and 13 million more Christian women than men. Many women go to church on their own. They have to drag their husband to church, they drag their children to church. It is your job, men, to lead spiritually. You pray with the family. You read the Bible with the family. You pick a good church, become a member of it, submit to it. You pick the community group or midweek class you will be in. You are the one to lead the family spiritually.

Start with a prayer

Some guys say, “Well, I don’t know what to do.” Just start by praying with your wife. There are women who will read this sermon and deep down in their heart, this is what they want the most, “If my husband would just pray with me.”

There are some of you guys, you pray with all kinds of people, you don’t pray with your wife. Do you pray with your wife? Do you pray with your kids? Do you read the Bible with your wife? Do you talk about Jesus with your wife? Do you talk about Jesus with your kids?

Leading spiritually is the foundation of everything else.

chiam see tong

2011-05-02T08:41:00.000-07:00

An abstract written by someone on fb.

And so I really wanted to know what are the dreams of the opposition parties. I wanted to know how they think about human life. I wanted to know how they can lead Singaporeans to feel beautiful again. Is there someone who can wake up the sleeping flowers in our hearts?

I found the answer in Mr. Chiam See Tong today at SPP rally.

Mr.Chiam began his speech with the question of why he decided to leave Potong Pasir and contest in Bishan-Toa Payoh. He answered, "for the promotion of democracy. There can never be democracy if there is no opposition in the parliament." There isn't a fancy slogan like first-world parliament, which at times really makes one wonder what it means. Mr.Chiam's fight is for democracy, and he will never retire with a peaceful mind if he does not see this happening in Singapore. This is the reason why he has to break a GRC, the dirtiest divide-and-rule tactic the ruling party has devised since JBJ won a seat in Anson.

Do I doubt Mr.Chiam's fight? There is very little room for doubt when you see him in person: frail in physique, strong as steel in the mind, and gentle as a whispering father in his speech. There is almost no room for doubt when you think about how he and Mrs.Chiam have suffered under the government's brutality (he still doesn't have his own office) trying to serve the residents in Potong Pasir the best that they can. And there is absolutely no room for doubt when you continue listening till the end of his speech, because he values every individual as a human being capable of living her or her life to the fullest, and is not just a pawn or a statistics.

I will describe to you my memory of the conclusion of his speech, which took place after quite a long pause. I imagined that his team was worried it would be too tiring for him to continue, but he insisted to carry on.

Like a grandfather telling a story to his grandchildren, Mr.Chiam told us how Lee Kuan Yew first assessed this man called Chiam See Tong. LKY looked at his O level certificate. (laughter from the crowd)

"He counted very carefully. 1. 2. 3...5. Only 5 O levels?" (another round of laughter)

"How many of you have 5 O level?"

My best friend shouted "I don't have any!" as several in the crowd raised their hands.

Mr.Chiam smiled in his heart (I could feel) and replied,

"Then you and I are the same. And I have become a lawyer now."

At this point, the crowd cheered so loudly that a friend who was sleeping on the other side of the estate was woken up by the uproar. After a round of hearty laughter, the crowd fell silent as Mr.Chiam continued speaking (he apologised in the beginning that we have to be very quiet because he couldn't speak loudly). He told us that it is o.k if we are not as smart as the others, and it is o.k if we do not seem as successful as the others. Some of us maybe late bloomers, but all of us have the potential to be better people, as long as we stay true to ourselves and keep trying.

"When there is life there is hope, when there is hope, there will be change."

I will always remember how effortlessly he had delivered that line and how many people were moved to tears while listening to him speak. Besides the immediate reference that despite two strokes, Mr.Chiam continue his fight for change in Singapore, I believe that these tears are also the most heartfelt human emotions that can only be brought out by the encouragement of a most loving father.

It is okay. It is okay.
You have not failed.
I have not failed.
We have not failed.

Just keep trying, my child,
together, let's keep trying.

With each living breath,
We can be better.
We will be better.

Thank you Mr. Chiam See Tong. I was in such a despair after reading and witnessing so much atrocities and brutality that the ruling party and Lee Kuan Yew have done to gentle people like you, Dr. Vincent Cheng, Ms Teo Suh Lung, Dr. Lim Hock Siew and many more people who have been forever silenced in the PAP version of history. I was in such a despair thinking how Singaporeans will disappear with the influx of yet another 1 million foreigners. I was in such a despair thinking how our children will have to grow up in this self-perserving culture that propagates bottomless fear and arrogance thinking about nothing but Money. But tonight, you have shown me, shown all Singaporeans, the light. And I am not angry and upset anymore.

a free tuition

2011-04-22T09:39:00.001-07:00

gave 'tuition' for free. travelled all the way to WOODLANDS... my God it's alien place man.... to help my p5 boy in his studies. This is just one aspect of his life that needs help, but a very practical and crucial aspect. as i was teaching him, the question of why am i doing this keep popping up in my head. and i know i have to commit to this for some time.

but on my journey home, i reasoned with myself, man i am doing this for God! the tuition fees cannot be counted in monetary sense. the rewards will be intangible. seeing him understanding my lesson and taking extra effort to write down wad i taught in his notebook and the smile aft that makes it worthwhile. the macs meal i ate with him and the sincere word of 'thank you' really brings joy. of cos, the next step will be to incorporate more stuff like maybe reading the bible for 10 mins etc instead of just teaching. i hope it works. i know God will.

hope sem

2011-04-15T22:12:00.000-07:00

Using this hols to do my reflection piece for Hope Sem. There are a total of 10 weeks' worth to be done. Shall post them up one by one. I often do this for my sch modules but it feels weird doing this essay style for bible study...

Topic 1 – Introduction to Christian Faith
In the first lesson, I learned about the definition of doctrines and an overview of what it is. According to the notes, doctrine is defined as the truths of God’s words to be taught. It can also be viewed as an instruction manual from God.

In my opinion, this understanding is important for our lives and how we treat the bible. The bible is more than just a storybook or a set of do-s and don’t-s; it is God’s way of speaking to us directly. I remember something I learned some years ago- many times people ask: “I will only believe in God if I see Him.” And the answer is “God has already appeared to us. Look at the bible.” As Christians, we are ‘born again’, leaving our old self and walking towards a new life. In this process of becoming more like Christ, we need guidance, advices and words of wisdoms. All these can only be found in the bible.

One of the purposes of the doctrine is to guide believers to God’s intended destiny for them. To me, this is crucial as our lives are clouded with many distractions, especially with living in a fast-paced society such as Singapore. We need to be firm in our belief and certain of where we are heading. Otherwise, our lives will just go through the motion, similar to any non-believing friends we have. God has a unique plan for each of us and His method of revealing it is usually step-by-step. The key to unlocking life’s mystery could simply be faithful in reading the bible and asking God to reveal it through His words or prayers.

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Topic 2 Bibliology- The doctrine of Scripture
In this lesson, we learned how the scripture is formed, preserved and written by the apostles. A key concept learned is ‘inspiration of scripture’, which means ‘the personal influence of the spirit of God on the mind and soul of man’.

The fundamental principle is the involvement of the Holy Spirit in writing the doctrines; a picture to explain this concept is a scene of a sailing boat being carried forward by the wind (2 Pet 1:20-21). Similarly, the writers’ emotions, minds and wills are all directed by the Holy Spirit. The terms to describe this are ‘divine-human interaction’ and ‘plenary-verbal inspiration’, which means that even the choices of words the writers used are inspired by God.

In my opinion, inspiration is the most important factor for us putting our entire faith into the Word of God. This concept proves that the bible is infallible and that it is literally the word of God. With this is mind, we can then trust the bible and its instructions fully. Otherwise, the bible will only become a set of instruction manual written by any spiritual guru or famous authors. The fact that the bible is inspired also tells us that the Word of God is of absolute divine authority and our lives should be subjected to the bible. Thus when we read the bible, we can be absolutely secure in the authenticity and trustworthiness of God’s words.

Additional Information describing plenary inspiration which I found helpful:
A divine influence full and sufficient to secure its end. The end in this case secured is the perfect infallibility of the Scriptures in every part, as a record of fact and doctrine both in thought and verbal expression. So that although they come to us through the instrumentality of the minds, hearts, imaginations, consciences, and wills of men, they are nevertheless in the strictest sense the word of God (Hodge, 1860).

wad a ride

2011-04-10T12:05:00.000-07:00

finally my awaited 3-weeks break... somehow this week seems as packed; with the conversational teaching on top of my tuitions... but at least all these wout stress... nah ... safe for the anger management i need when teaching serangoon garden sch... i die also wont send my children there...

o deary me... the car ride home was... i just um chio-ed. how unpredictable life is.

hopekids

2011-03-29T22:42:00.001-07:00

Hi Hong Teck, just want to comment that you have did a good job with the children ministry. I run into a visitor 2 Sundays ago, her name is Jenica, Edna's pre school principle. She was impressed with the Hope Kids ministry, how it is run & even the shuttle bus service provided. And her 2 children are also very motivated to come because of the Reward system... haa haa ... Which is why she was back the 2nd time and hopefully more. She is looking for a church to settle down, and I think children church is a major consideration. Praise God for leaders like you!
- a letter from one of the parents to HT

just so u know hopekids' ministry is no kids' play.

2011-03-27T05:01:00.000-07:00

elements of doubt occurred thruout yst.
am i credible enough?
do people appreciate?
am i skilled enough?
it sure is poisonous as it affects almost every other aspects of my mood and actions.

2011-03-22T21:24:00.000-07:00

In their book Relationships, Drs Les and Leslie Parrott shared this secret: “If you try to find intimacy with another person before achieving a sense of intimacy on your own, all your relationships become an attempt to complete yourself.” To build healthy relationships, you first need to learn to become whole or complete – to have a sense of self-worth, self-identity and healthy self concept. It is the old saying – “be the right person first rather than trying to look for the right person.

seriously serious.

2011-03-20T09:51:00.000-07:00

i dont shop, i dont club, i dont drink, but i eat.
i think the amt i spent on food this wk hit an astronomical 3 digit figure, with rays bday, jb, and the past 3 nights of supper.

yst's sermon grappled me by the neck; it taught me to be serious.
yes, it's time to be serious abt what i am doing and what's entrusted to me.

prayer

2011-03-11T02:18:00.001-08:00

Proverbs 16:9
In your heart you plan your life.
But the Lord decides where your steps will take you.

just browsed upon this tagline: no man is greater than his prayer life.
prayer; the path to greatness!

busy

2011-03-08T23:16:00.000-08:00

father pls help me.
tons of assignments.

a year

2011-03-04T19:28:00.000-08:00

wad a difference a year makes.
i was thinking this time of the year in 2010, who are the people i was close with, what are the things i am doing.
there's a tinge of regret and disappointment, a hint of 'bui kam guan' and some confusion as to why lidat.
yet, there are some things to look forward to, certain people whom i have forged closer relationships with.
it's a double whammy.
no man's an island. people need friends to survive. it's my strength and i think it helps me draw closer to God.
but yet, in the process i may conveniently leave God out of the picture.
an irony.
move on.

2011-03-02T20:44:00.001-08:00

not exactly the first to admit..
i'm sick.

be holy

2011-02-28T08:48:00.001-08:00

1 peter 1
14 As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance. 15 But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do; 16 for it is written: “Be holy, because I am holy.”[a]
17 Since you call on a Father who judges each person’s work impartially, live out your time as foreigners here in reverent fear. 18 For you know that it was not with perishable things such as silver or gold that you were redeemed from the empty way of life handed down to you from your ancestors, 19 but with the precious blood of Christ, a lamb without blemish or defect. 20 He was chosen before the creation of the world, but was revealed in these last times for your sake.

Armed with a bottle of hoegaarden and the bible, God speaks. Be holy.

damn the reservist.

2011-02-28T06:51:00.000-08:00

More
by Karen Lim - Copyright © 2004 New Creation Church

VERSE 1:
Lord unveil Your face
As I worship You
Reveal Your majesty
Touch my heart anew

VERSE 2:
Lord unveil my eyes
To see Your glorious truths
The love You give so free
Has drawn my heart to You

CHORUS:
I can't help but love You more
When more and more I see
How much I mean to You, Jesus

I can't help but want You more
When more and more I see
Your goodness unto me
I fall in love with
You more and more

it's not a matter of being alone or being away, but a matter of being in Him.

Every car trip with PJ, even tho is short, leaves memories. This time rd, it's divine, that he highlighted a team going to church plant in the country i am aiming to go for. I mentioned in LG that my missions this year would be the exchange programme if it's successful. PJ prayed for me before he alighted. In addition, he ended of with another very personal and specific prayer that sort of deliighted me. haha. it was a pleasant surprise nontheless. lets hope it works out.

i tot the reservist would do me good. but it turned out the opposite. still, these are mistakes that i can learn from. down but not out.

^^

2011-02-13T10:26:00.000-08:00

reciprocated.
happy.

3rd ICT of my life.
hope it's a good one to relax and think.

a simple life

2011-02-07T09:48:00.000-08:00

i just want a simple life-
getting my dream occupation (which many may disagree it's a 'dream' occupation)
go to church and serve people and play my music
go exercising and playing sports with loved ones
get a weekend car
nurturing kids
hanging out with family and friends

some ppl value achievements, money, personal space. but family and friends are of utmost importance to me.

i expect some people to scorn at such a lack of ambition; but i see it as of greater value than wealth or fame could bring.

seems simple yeah. tat's why i hope to get selected for my exchange trip; to push myself and leave the four walls of this church. It dawned upon me when PJ preached that this IS my missions trip for the year. the missing link connected.

why these random thoughts? it's a hectic week; to motivate myself to go thru this.

CNY 2011

2011-02-04T11:35:00.000-08:00

CNY was great this year. same routine; more memories created.

the most heart-warming was at gi's and jon's hse, tog w kiap who is from indo. if there's one thing i learn from the Tay family, it's the hospitality tat they show (kiap went joined their reunion dinner as well).
the happiest moment was at daniel's hse just now, with a couple of friends and the newly-wed hanging out at his hse, and receiving hongbao from Daniel!
the most meaningful time was a short chat with my niece constance at amk macs while waiting for our movie to start. i learned alot from you, even at yr age.
the most expensive moment was triple three w wal n co., $70... wagyu wagyu wagyu.
the most simple was a good impromptu chat with rayson over ice cream today. as always, i learned plenty from him.

i have enjoyed myself throughly. time to hit the books. i have plenty of catch up to do.

sth else for me to ponder: same route, different feel. as debbie commented just nw over the phone: "you sound very excited!"

hoegaarden

2011-01-22T10:07:00.000-08:00

hoegaarden is one of the smoothest beer ard.
i am enjoying a bottle of it right now.
actually, the love affair started when freed came for a short two-days.
me jon n freed just camped in gi's bedroom, conquered 5 bottles of hoegaarden, played monopoly deal, chat, talked and joked, all while gi is asleep.
i think this bond goes beyond personality and backgrd, it's truly a god-given support tat we have to one another.

my niece's prayer.

2011-01-15T08:24:00.000-08:00

i love my cousin's advices.
at the wedding dinner today, she asked me to pray for a good future girlfriend.
i said not yet laa... but she said even her daughter, 16, has started praying altho she wants to put dating on hold for 10 years.
hahaha maybe i shld...
my cousin says she has eyes for a biblical woman. i trust her for tat; yes she will be the first few i will introduce to, even if it means flying all the way to Klang.

slacking mood.

2011-01-14T07:14:00.000-08:00

i'm doing things beyond me.
or rather, i'd prefer choosing eating supper than...
preparing for cg
typing out spiritual gifts notes
preparing hopekids cg

but like i said, nth to complain.
only good can come out of these.
it trains me to be a man. hahaha.

dad's gesture

2011-01-10T21:05:00.001-08:00

so, CNY is coming.
tat means ang-baos are coming.
and the yearly routine of going gi's and jontay's houses for the fourth year running.
love those moments best.
wonder who will be the first to give out hongbaos. hahaha.

yst's musician core with kaiwen was unexpectedly awesome.
i am thankful for being able to contribute to the discipleship and having the symphonic band playing a more prominent role in the music ministry.
i have little technical expertise to contribute, but i am thankful for other strengths like pastorally.

one of my greatest wish is for my mum's health to improve this year.
she needs to eat more, seriously.
always fretting whether me and my bro have eaten but herself scrimping on food.
i have been deliberately ta-paoing food for her and my dad has also been coming home during lunch just to fetch her out to eat.
tat gesture caught me by surprise.
something great tat i can learn from.

the first meeting in 2011

2011-01-07T09:32:00.000-08:00

i wish holidays last forever.
but i know it won't.

had a good catch up with hongmun today. all the more convinced that i shld go exchange. we also had pretty similar values and views on relationships. awesome.

had my first meet up in yao's team. 4 hours. with food of course. my scheduler became more packed aft the meeting ended. no complains tho, this is wad i prayed for in 2010 when i asked God to use me. He really spammed. LOL.

on a heavier note, it feels weird. i think i need more time to get over it. or at least restore the balance in me. mr joshua harris, pls help me.

joggings

2011-01-05T10:27:00.001-08:00

one sentence from voon-ma kept me awake. was jogging with her, gi, puay n hx. yes, i will lao-lao rmb wad u said and work towards it.

another 10km with jiehui just nw was indeed shiok. i wanna work towards an even healthier lifestyle and losing weight. had a tight half an hr conversation w him over passion and how we shld channel them properly. the analogy discussed was: if u r ronaldo playing in birmingham, will you switch to old trafford or stay on and bring yr team to the top?

2011

2011-01-02T10:02:00.000-08:00

i think of 2011 and i shudder.

suddenly all my modules up level to 3000, from a mixture of 2000-3000s.
entrusted with greater responsibilities for CG; i need to plan and ensure my fellow cg mates grow as a cohesive community.
in the music core team with kaiwen, which i am still not sure if i'm up for it.
p5 coordinator for hopekids, from simply caring for the p6s together with the ever dependable grace to working w more kids and teachers.
wanting to achieve more in symph band esp aft ending the year with a bang.
shepherdings; need to be more conscientious and faithful in this.

my resolution for this year is just two things.
1) discipline in time management.
2) spirit of excellence.

all these roles and responsibilities shoot up one level compared to 2010. In fact, i have been managing them quite well but to go level up, it sure requires sacrifices, pain and sweat.

my friends who may be reading this, do constantly pray and ask me abt it.

i look back and i thank God how he picked me up from mid year to help me find meaning, purpose and success in symph band, studies and hopekids.

perhaps 2 other resolutions will still be carried forward from 2010:
1) parents closer to conversion
2) JIAN FEI. haha.

roadtrip 2010

2011-01-01T01:30:00.001-08:00

the road trip was enjoyable to say the least.
driving around searching for food and places was an adventure; travelling at 140km/hr at 4am and without lamppost was nerve-wrecking; the crowd was spontaneous with everyone is good spirits and accomodating.
there were certainly hits and misses in this trip, sth that make a road trip all the more enjoyable.
hits:
successfully navigating to our hotel venues in short period of time
finding food places in malacca through maps- yongtaufoo, bei zhan (the first time we went it was full-house)
random midnite K tog w hy and kat
very cheap shopping at malacca and sunway
ending high with crayfish at JB
the all guys conversation at A&W

miss:
turning into wrong direction at NS highway & travelling 30 km for the next u-turn
lousy food (steanboat dipped in satay sauce, yucks)
MOS- a club with only abt 20 ppl in today. how fail can it get?
odessey stalled 3 times- made us panic. but it turned out all right; the replacement m'sian car (google hyundai starex) is the biggest car all of us have ever seen in our entire life. seriously.

this trip is definitely worth the money.
wonderful crowd, cheap shopping, and thrilling moments when we got lost. all part of a road trip.

overheard this comment just recently. the backbone of a successful man is a supportive wife. how true.

a fireproof relationship?

2010-12-26T05:07:00.000-08:00

a series of events and a huge huge bomb threw to me at the beginning of the week left me slightly wary of relationships. truth is, i don't know how to handle mistrust or left being caught in a difficult situation. would i be able to take it if my partner threw me a bomb such as this? would i be able to still trust the person? to be honest, i think need some time to fully get over it. i pray and i believe it is possible cos of the fact u chose to tell me and be open. perhaps it's got to do with my personality. one of the affirmation i received this yr was that i am a good friend cos you get what you see me as. no need for pretence, no need for secrets. i like to trust ppl ard me and i think tat tis true. perhaps this is the reason why i expect the same of my friends. and this is left me afraid what if marriage don't turn out right. but of cos, there is no 100% gurantee is all relationships, be it family or friends or marriage. There might be a chance that even i myself would stray. even the almighty hope founder strayed too rit. haha... the only gurantee is Jesus himself that's why to find a girl that obeys the WOG 100% is crucial. it has to be a given criteria. and i'm still looking forward to this mantra: i want my girlfriend to be my first and my last.

going Malacca for four days. happy cos i will be driving there. scared bcos it's damn malaysia i am driving to. pls pray for my safety!

my two friends

2010-12-22T19:43:00.000-08:00

it's been a heavy night. i pray for the both of you, that God's grace and strength will carry u thru this period =)

cell in the house

2010-12-17T22:21:00.000-08:00

my neighbour looks like they are holding cell in their house.. with loud cheers... and xmas carolling... my curiosity got the better of me and i went out to take a peep... din manage to see much.. but it made me wonder, when will be my hsehold's turn?

joshua 24:15

the day 8 NE volunteers encouraged me

2010-12-13T07:44:00.000-08:00

i went to camp without much expectations.
but i left camp worried that i may not be up to challenges.
i know this is the chance to rise to the occasion, the best opp to stretch and grow.
i'm up for it god!

today is good for many reasons.
i thank god that 8 NE volunteers last minute availed themselves to help move logistics at kallang and nexus hours aft camp ended.
i hoped and i believed i made a positive impact in them; pushing for cab reimbursement, buying drinks and food for them, and also spent some time knowing some of these SA juniors more and encouraging them.
seeing them serve and move the huge crazy black boxes with a smile and laughters certainly encouraged me too.
and joseph, who followed the truck thruout the day till he reached home at 8 plus. had many enjoyable chats with him in the truck; he's truly awesome.

but this made me see the negative side of ppl. clearly rmbed this person's reaction when i asked him to help load the boxes: he shook his head, rubbed his arm and mumbled tired. YA RIT. i dont rmb u doing much in camp other than doing plenty of break dancing in the middle of the nite. hahaha o well, lets just say i am super angry at by that reaction, esp when non minops volunteers are the ones who readily agreed.

today also marks the return of sth else. happy.

church camp 2010?

2010-12-09T10:16:00.000-08:00

honestly, i am not prepared for this camp.
been preoccupied with exams tmw, catching up w freed for the past two nites and symph pracs earlier on.
been hit with a news tat my mum 'self-hospitalised' to get herself checked. it made me mad cos she never tell anyone that she's not feeling well. she does it with the best of intentions of not wanting us to worry, but it made me all the more worried from just nw till now. i hope to have her good talk with her soon and get my msg across.
burdened for her.

finishers' tee 2010

2010-12-06T09:58:00.000-08:00

i would like to describe this year's race as horrible.

me and victor set out to hit a timing of 5:30. We were full of confidence, zipping in and out of human traffic for the first 8km. We sure were fast! den came the first setback. Vic had stitch. we walked for abt half a km. I ran on and we met at 21km for photos. The time read 2:40. Still feeling energetic posing for photos den! afterwards came the killer. My tigh muscle cramped up; i could literally see the muscle bulging out and contracting. den came the scorching heat. Plus many many seemingly endless straight roads. The ECP stetch was the most horrendous. upslope plus no trees or shelter or water points. know wads the suckiest feeling? when u look ard you and only 2-3ppl are jogging. the rest were literally walking; the sun really sapped all our energy. i finished at an all-time low 6:45. the scariest part was when on my way home, i felt dizzy, headache and wanted to vomit. i am pretty sure it is mild heat exhaustion. i actually bought a bottle of water n sat outside amk mrt cheers for a good five mins. on the way back, i was so scared i might just faint anytime. i think it's really scary cos when i reached home, i just lie on the floor and recalled me telling my cousin to pour me a glass of water; drank a sip or two and den slept on the floor, unchanged! woke up an hour later with the headache gone. i think God really sustained me cos i prayed that i wont peng-san b4 i reached home.

will i join agn the next year? maybe, maybe not. the motivation and novelty wearing off. but thinking back, i can understand why ppl wanna put themselves thru this torture year aft year. at least for me, it's a chance to stretch my determination level to the max. it's a chance to achieve sth i can be proud of. the reward? the finishers' tee.

42.195

2010-12-03T08:54:00.000-08:00

ION-clarkquay- chinatown- Esplanade- nicoll highway- ECP- bedok jetty- MBS- Padang.

i am staring at the race route and bracing myself. excited yet nervous. i think this is one of my most unprepared run. just enjoy den (:

gracia

2010-12-02T09:17:00.001-08:00

I couldnt express my joy any much more than this msg. it's from gracia- the kid i blogged earlier whom hasnt turn up for church for ages. it must be the work of God.

G-racia!(: says:
help me do something!~
wanggg says:
ya?
G-racia!(: says:
help me text my mama and tell her this sat i going )
i dont know how tell her
ha..
wanggg says:
haha
ok sure

i'm lovin' it

2010-12-02T09:01:00.001-08:00

I am beginning to love it all.
my sch work- despite the usu complains.
hoildays- malacca!!!
break- i hv two exams left only. freedom of time.
ministry- the symph band is getting more involved and so am i. happy.
my life- cldn't have been more focused. forced by circumstances.
uni- i hope my exchange pulls thru!
god?- yeah he's the reason for everything.

my overdue bday card

2010-11-29T07:09:00.001-08:00

i had lunch w my awesome friend today and she finally gave me my long overdue bday card.
in it wrote: "i have no qualms u will do well in yr studies + ministry bcos God's power n presence will manifest in a pure heart like yours."
it's very encouraging; reminds me of who i am and what i set out to be.
i learned many things from her; esp in the areas of relationships.
it's insightful indeed.
thanks ms chong.

something i caught from jaeson ma's testimony:
'if u want to have passion for Jesus, you have to study his passion for u' how much he loves you, how much he suffered and died for u. 1 John 4 says 'we love him because he first loves us'.

my 4th sem.

2010-11-25T03:30:00.000-08:00

today seems to be a string of bad results.
i got back an assignment tat i had high hopes for but turns out to be credit.
called my tuition kid and he did badly for his PSLE.
called some hopekids and they told me their results, abt 208. not too good either.
worst, i don't know how to encourage them. asked hongteck for some tips on how to encourage kids and hopefully i dont need to apply it too often.

it made me wonder, 3 sems ago, i guess i would be satisfied with a credit grade, happy perhaps. have i grown to be unrealistic, have i slacken off, or have i started to rely on myself? or maybe this is a call for me to put in more effort cos i haven't been the most hardworking this sem. If i were god, would i choose to bless someone smart or someone hardworking?

am studying with hy now. honestly i'd rather sleep at home cos i have no work in need of urgent completion. but it's been some time since he ownself jio'ed. go mr hy.

2010-11-23T08:08:00.000-08:00

for a good five minutes, i contemplated giving up and just do what i want to do. but the opportunity cost is too big a privilege to forsake; symphonic band, the kids, schwork, friends. the greatest failure is to give up when success is just round the corner. i can sense it; the pile of work ahead is enormous, but i foresee even greater rewards beyond that.

bintan

2010-11-21T08:50:00.000-08:00

Bintan was a good getaway. a good relaxation. a strenous hols too. we got stuck in the sea paddling hard for close to an hour when the other kayak capsized and cracked. my kayak tried to tow them but to no avail. thankfully help came later on. i'm pretty sure my arm muscles grew by an inch. the service was excellent, smashing sg's service standard. the beach view is fantastic and the water five times clearer than sg's. the entire resort is well-packaged. however, it is nontheless costly compared to other neighbouring countries. and thruout the trip, i keep visualising coming back here in the future when i start work; either as a yearly getaway or with someone else special. =)

omg now that it is over, i realised i am in for another tough ride from now till exactly my next hols.

camp rehs
8 xmas rehs
a favour for miss loh to act in prexmas drama
2 major assignments due soon
2 exams in dec

time to stretch, time to grow, time to occupy myself. my break couldnt come at a better time. 26 dec, wait for me malacca!

knock negativity with positivity

2010-11-19T05:47:00.000-08:00

nat and luan chun enjoying sushi.

i had a smashing time with 3 hopekids today, nathalie(p6), gracia(p6) and her brother, gildon(p4). What started out as an intention to follow up nathalie sprung up more surprises than i could imagined.
due to last min changes, i had to ask luan chun to accompany me to follow up nat and play bball also. she suggested asking gracia along and she came with her bro. Gracia n gildon haven't been to church for months alr.
The initial one hr spent with nat was fruitful. i bought nat her fav salmon sushi for lunch. i rmbed cos she pointed at it last week when we passed by carrefour and i went back there to buy. Luan chun did a fantastic job sharing her conversion story and how she adapted and grew up in youth to encourage nat and nat responded well too. she is a kid with a soft spot for God and i am certainly looking forward to this kid growing up to be a woman of God.
Then came gracia and gildon, whom luan chun brought to church and also know them and their mum well. Here comes the main point, the two kids were 'negative kids', often being very negative with their speech and putting ppl down. The first five mins spent with them, things like 'why yr slippers so uncle', why u so fat, and when we were playing monopoly, 'haha lose', 'why you so slow', 'why u so suay' all came out. Man, i was praying hard, praying to be patient. it was tough, i mean it's been some time since ppl say u fat in the face. now i know why only 7% of the population can be effective with kids. it dawned upon that this cld be family influence and also an asian culture, where kids seldom get praised but often have their weaknesses harped upon. i prayed, really prayed, and was prompted to press on and speak positivity and build rapport with them, esp gildon, leaving luan chun to care for gracia.
It started with monopoly, where i said to gildon everytime he bought a house or receive cash 'good job', 'well done', 'wow u r rich'. It certainly worked wonders. We were 'teaming up' agst the rest towards the end of the game. The best part came when we teamed up agst the gals during basketball. Knowing that he is in sch team, i kept passing the ball to him and encouraging him to shoot, shouting praises like 'well done', 'wow' thruout the match. When he sprained his ankle, he was clutching it very badly. But i know it was just a bad bruise, and i keep telling him to stand up and 'it's ok, you will be fine aft a few days'. He carried on playing aft tat. (i guess any other parent will keep shouting 'why u so clumsy!' and 'next time don't bring u play alr!')During the break, i treated him to bubble tea and snack. While walking back to nat hse, i told him 'yr basketball is very good. keep training hard and you must one day enter the senior team. When you do so, teach me the skills you have learned'. And at that point he was calling me 'peter kor kor' ... haha... o man... o man...
The best part came towards the end, when we played another short round of monopoly, the gals were screaming at me like 'why u so slow' etc and gildon replied 'why u all so bad?'. haha. yeah man, i guessed it was really divine wisdom that i deployed this tactic and more imptly, i hoped i made positive impact in his life.
I asked Gildon to come hopekids and he nodded his head. I said this weekend i will be away and will ask him next sun. He readily agreed. I will pray tat he comes. Greater news was when nat and gracia are also going youth service tmw tog with luan chun. I am really thankful for ppl like luan chun who genuinely loves god's child n is also zai in handling them. Show that there is the huge and untapped 7% potential in the youth service to connect to hopekids.

The greatest reward today was discovering that kids need to have someone to believe in them, to tell them they are good, and to speak positively into their lives. it's really a privilege to learn this at my age and sth tat i will definitely carry into my future parenting.

it's time for a two day break and a semi retreat (:

2010-11-18T06:02:00.000-08:00

[Daryl Wong Onn Fa]
did the hopekids enjoyed the youth ?
[You]
10:00pm
hey!
yes they did!
haha nathalie said more enjoyable than sch
[Daryl Wong Onn Fa]
10:01pm
Hahaha, Oh I see.
Haha, of course.. :D:D
[You]
10:01pm
hahaha
ok hey i gtg
[Daryl Wong Onn Fa]
10:01pm
This is a hse of God.
LOL!
Ok bye.

this is from one of my p6 kid who went over to youth to be w his brother earlier than the other kids. i love the reply 'this is a hse of God'! haha yes! i shld enjoy service as much too.

2010-11-17T09:27:00.001-08:00

jiasimin. says:
too many fruits alreayd la
im confused
wanggg says:
no no
now i am focused
only one fruit
jiasimin. says:
HUH
wanggg says:
the fruit of the spirit
jiasimin. says:
what fruit u want
shit u la
-.-
wanggg says:
basket
u dont believe me
hahaha

'shit u laa'. this is why i love talking to my friends. haha.

happy bday mr leow.

2010-11-17T08:48:00.000-08:00

It's been a blessed dinner, really.
Just hearing shuz and roy talk abt the church, their concerns, struggles and hopes is very refreshing. it's good to know that these two individuals are committed, loyal and more imptly, spiritually sound-minded to Hope for over a decade.
Having daniel and huimei as mentors and life examples to emualate is itself a privilege. i am secure just being able to know them personally and to follow them.
Together with debbie, gideon and jontay who was missing due to exams, these are friends i know i can rely on and go thru life together.
i was telling debbie how blessed it is to just hear the two couples sharing abt life and concerns and how they want to help contribute to the church, it really is refreshing to the soul; more so when these stories come from these ppl themselves. I've learned plenty abt the ongoing struggles in the adults ss, but more imptly, how they fight on and see hope in spite of all the negative points. it made me all the more assured that the future of the church is in good hands. And because of such biblical examples, i'm also assured that as i follow christ whole-heartedly, my future is secured in christ and the desires of my heart will be granted. Seek first His kingdoma n righteousness n all these things will be added unto u.
i was telling debbie, 5 years later, it wld be interesting to gather in such a fashion agn. this time rd, maybe there'll be a kids corner and an additional table, and we can start guessing who our future partners are.
and also, just nw, daniel and huimei dropped sth interesting for me. hahaha. hmmmm...

mood

2010-11-16T20:01:00.000-08:00

i woke up feeling fresh today.
heading for a swim with huiyang in half an hr's time.
perhaps the meet up with hx last nite did it.
i was sharing with him a big point i learnt recently, from a book i am currently reading. 'Becoming who God intended' by David Eckman. It talks about how a person's mood(feelings) affects the desires(lusts) and subsequently sin(actions). Many a times we try to cut the root before the third stage, sin, even more so preaching that christians shld do this and shldnt do that. But this is perhaps the reason why there are many christians who feel frustrated or guilty that they cldnt achieve the standard and thus drop out of the race. It's bcos, if the first stage isn't solved(where you search and answer yr heart and emotional problem), prevention of the last stage can never be achieved. This book divinely answers some of my problems i am facing and as i was sharing to hx last nite, it helped me to be clearer of myself too. so yes, i woke up feeling good and i hope this is just the start.

my supper buddies.

2010-11-14T10:01:00.000-08:00

came back from a supper with deb jon gi minus miss loh who had work at a crazy hour. i appreciate the company, presence and food. i appreciate how we never judge one another no matter how judgemental we may be towards others. i appreciate just basking in the fellowship and listening gi giving his wise old comments. i appreciate how every single one takes initiative to organise a catch up and keep in constant contact. brothers and sisters i have many, but close friends are scarce. thanks once again friends.

i have some disappointments which i love to post but i know i cant. i shared to some of them just nw and hopefully all will be well in my heart. i need to pray. time will not heal, god will. den agn, wise old gi said all these are my logical assumptions. it may not be true aft all.

being exceptional in yr craft

2010-11-12T07:47:00.000-08:00

Yst, Nicholas had a performance on the piano. He owned the show. Lets just say throughout his performance, my jaws dropped. Me, chris, joel all had the same expression at the end of it. Rare moments when the audience gave a standing ovation. What impressed me most was the opportunity nick grabbed to influence ppl thru his music. Aft his impressive performance, he re-entered the stage, thanked his family and played a short piece. The song was 'turn yr eyes upon Jesus'. Wow. That was what i was exactly chatting with him abt few weeks back; if u own the concert, u can do whatever u want to it.

Nick msned me this email the wife of an orchestra conductor sent to him:

This is Mrs Yan Yin Wing. I and two other orchestra committee members sat through the whole concert “Tedd Joselson and Friends in Concert” representing BHSO. You played very well and when you played “Turn your eyes upon Jesus”, I was touched that you had Him by your side.

Mr Yan also had to lean very hard on Jesus as this concert outcome dealt quite a blow. We will spare you the unpleasant details and just want to encourage you in your music journey as we did our own children, the eldest of whom is a professional cellist, chamber musician and music educator.

Wishing you a most exciting musical journey ahead,
Mrs Yan

and nick himself msn-ed this:
nick band says:
haha
my grandma teared
she told my mom she liked the song very much
den my mom told her its a hymn haha
and it took me a lot of courage to do it
because the audience mostly jews
and my teacher certainly didn't like that "stunt" a lot
hahaha

This is how you can influence ppl through your craft.

triple blessing.

2010-11-08T07:51:00.000-08:00

i think prayer helps you to be sure of what you want and what to expect.
a triple blessing.
i was alone in the sch lib today and decided to be nice and sit with one of my classmate from china. helped explained morning's lecture and chit chatted. helped sourced out moe's website since she curious abt teaching also. in turn found out her dad is in one of shanghai's tv station and she could easily get me a short intern in the eng channel there if i want. haha it's a good trade. but more than that, i started out purely wanting to help her and this is a good reward!
met xgwen for lunch since her workplace is like super near my sch. thanks for the treat! so paiseh.. haha i treat her back fruits.
and lastly, met derek up for dinner. honestly, i always fret cos i dont want it to seem like i meet him up everytime to ask for favours. i prayed. and it was an awesome time. instead, i shared some of my concerns regarding the band and was enlightened by his advices. i pray that he will take more ownership and i will cont to give my best at the same time. january service here i come!

2010-11-07T09:50:00.000-08:00

read on.

wanggg says:
anws, look at every monday's life section
they hv interview with one profile every mon
what interview is this for? newspaper, report, business or entertainment?
Esther says:
oohh
okay
its a feature article. newsletter layout.
wanggg says:
haha icic
yupp same as mine dden
Esther says:
but should be okay ba
400-450 words
haha
wanggg says:
ok, do some research
online
like when rainbow is founded
any history?
who is/are the owners
Esther says:
oh yea
wanggg says:
how big are they
from internet
den when u meet them, ask qtns tat online cant find
like 'why an aquarium?'
'why the name rainbow?'
'in such a busy society, do ppl still actually have time to rear fishes as pets?'
Esther says:
okay
how come you talk about aquarium
haha
rainbow centre is a non profit organisation that caters to children with special needs in singapore
lol
wanggg says:
omg
OMG
Esther says:
hahahahahhahaah
wanggg says:
i tot is the serangoon north the rainbow fish aquarium
HAHAHA
Esther says:
HAHAHAHA

LOL.

happy bday mr lau.

2010-11-07T08:00:00.000-08:00

js came back from supper with jh n potato to celebrate hy's very belated bday. only the four of us, the rest were sort of busy with sch n stuff. i recalled the last time we met was for my bday, with victor, foo and sijie. i miss these bunch of brothers, and it always seems a joy hanging out with them. perhaps bcos it's heartening to know friends in the same life stage going well and strong in church. indeed these r the ppl i will think of for sources of encouragement.

seek ye first the kingdom of God, and all these things shall be added unto you.
i just need to focus on walking right with god all the days of my life and my path will be made straight, the desires of my heart will be blessed. Naive as it sounds, i think this is a thin line between child-like faith and blind faith.

omg. i was searching for old pics and realised... i have grown fatter! shit...

2010-11-06T05:39:00.001-07:00

i just read this blog post that WOW-ed me. it really awakened my senses. it seems like i have been chasing the wind. i will really chew upon it and make it my mantra line.

what's in the inside?

2010-11-06T05:25:00.000-07:00

someone today asked if i have been busy cos i looked tired. i said no but aft that i thank god the person asked. cos it made me realised that my condition inside will show and reflect in the appearance outside, no matter how hard you try to smile. yes, thruout the day i was bothered with a thought. saw this quote in ht's blog, 'Write it down. Clarity is worth it' . he is someone that writes and draws his thoughts alot. i used to do it, felt that it helped, but due to the common virus called laziness, it somehow stopped. perhaps tonite i will try to resume this habit.

lost

2010-11-04T11:38:00.000-07:00

who borrowed my external hard disk? it contains thousands all my photos from previous com which i treasure dearly...

2010-11-02T05:53:00.000-07:00

throw in another learning point.

you wont know the filth inside you unless u dig it out and do a maekover.

i found a living bug. yucks.

room makeover

2010-11-01T07:37:00.000-07:00

a room makeover taught me many things.

1) Beauty doesn't last forever.
i do a major room overhaul once every year, usually at year end. But this time round i can't take it anymore, my room is in a mess. What's beautiful the previous year won't remain beautiful wothout proper maintenance. Which comes to my second pt,

2) Everyday housekeeping is less tedious than a major overhaul.
Maintenance is key. A neat and tidy room has many benefits. it makes you happy, feel good, relaxed, saves time from searching for lost items, and being organised brings confidence.

3) relive the moment
everytime i think back of how beautiful my room once was, i get motivated to do one step better. yes, think of the good times, what had been, and what could be.

4) it takes time and sweat
it's been two days and i am only half done. everytime i pack and clean, i sweat. try doing hsehold chores if you haven't in your life. it takes effort, intentional effort.

why these points? probably becos i need it in my walk with god too.

the jigsaw puzzle.

2010-10-30T11:32:00.001-07:00

today sort of confirms what have been building up for weeks.
from the million dollar chat with dennis at starbucks, thur's one hour walkathon with god, yst's efforts to source the net for inspiration and passion regarding my music ministry, and today's sermon plus worship meet.
it all links, like a jigsaw puzzle put together piece by piece, covering almost every aspect i am concerned with in my life.

in summary, i need to...
let go and let god.
have a sense of urgency for my remaining time in legacy ministries.
dream big for the symphonic ministry and put it into action.
be prepared to be humbled greatly as more pro ppl run the show.
be active in shepherding.
a shift of focus and channel my energy and thoughts into studies, ministries and family.
build myself up.
let go and let god.
haha yeah the last one is a repeat to serve as a reminder.

it's quite bombarding to be honest. i need more time to consolidate.

2010-10-29T22:08:00.000-07:00

i found it. HK. hahaha. got alot alot of comns courses in eng. cheap accomodation too. no need language barrier. o god, i pray that i get it.

prayer

2010-10-29T06:56:00.000-07:00

read sth that reminded me greatly the power of prayer.

Paul in his scriptures kept saying how he was praying for others and remembering them in his heart.
"Paul believed that spiritual growth can happen in us through the help of the prayers of others on our behalf"
If (the prayer of) another person can affect my deepest thoughts by appealing to heaven on my behalf, I wonder how much of me is shaping others.
Names immediately flashed across my mind. Names that i want to pray for but neglecetd. I will be praying for you all.

the walk home

2010-10-28T11:49:00.000-07:00

i walked home from kovan. that is like 5km? took me exactly an hour. cldn't jog any longer; not aft supper at ponggol nasi lemak area.

but the walk was worth it. it's been a long while since i am forced to pray and seek god, to cast aside all worries and distraction. i mean, wad else could u do while walking home at 1am?
i received some answers. valuable ones. two words came strongly: let go. the picture of our hands gripping tightly when god wants to bless surfaced. i scolded myself in the process: you are a timid idiot who dare not let go.
and along the way, i had plenty of time to just think and pray, sort of letting my mind wonder. i prayed for my exchange, prayed for my ministry, thought of my sheep, thought of my family, and thought of how best can i grow in this coming one year period.
i need to lead myself before i can lead others.
and it was a fruitful walk. possibly the best walk ever.

2010-10-28T03:53:00.000-07:00

list of choices are
1) KU
2) Seijo
3) ? I DUNNO. most likely china or germany or hk. do research agn tmw.

a gift.

2010-10-28T03:13:00.001-07:00

i called my mum aft sch asking if she wants food.
instead i received a very happy piece of news from her.
i smiled all the way from outram to punggol mrt, literally grinning.
god is good, choosing to bless me at this moment of time when my bulk assignments are completed.
it could well be the best early christmas gift.

the durian tree(s)

2010-10-27T10:38:00.000-07:00

uh uh. i hate it when placed in an awkward situation. i guess my classmate recently described me aptly; i'm diplomatic. more like i genuinely want the best for everyone. today's supper ended with a couple of awkward moments. the talk abt durian trees and climbers shifted the atmosphere. nontheless it's better than hee hee haa haa and how's yr day conversations. i believe no true friendship is 100% harmonious. and i trust in them all.

anws i came across this pic of a recent wedding couple. 'a lifelong friend whom i will grow in love day after day'. very sweet indeed.

what makes me smile?

2010-10-26T10:06:00.000-07:00

nah for once im not talking abt food.
a random bus ride with guofeng resulted in a short sharing on what he learned recently abt counselling. or rather, self-counselling.
"it's impt to know ourselves, what we enjoy and loathe, what makes us and breaks us, which are the moments we smile or frown; both psychologically and in our spiritual life."
i cant deny the past week has a mixture of high and lows. a mixture of wad placed a smile and wad resulted in frustration. a mixture of fun and sadness. and becos of tat it has created further confusion.
haha damn it i am now confused. heck, awaiting fri. till then, one more assignment to go!

2010-10-22T09:02:00.001-07:00

SIJIEHU: You know lives are impacted when the kid said 'i admire teacher peter because he teach us the bible'. (: good job, @andypeterr :D

i just only saw this tweet. makes it all worthwhile.

rooney

2010-10-22T07:14:00.000-07:00

"Grown men move on," as Ferguson has said in the past. It is now time for Rooney to prove that he was worthy of the fuss.

it's weird. it really is. i contemplated doing a rooney saga, just so to prove if this is really what i want. and then i thought back of all the good times, and some principles infused in me. or maybe becos i lack boldness to do it. i hope not. i remember the challenge put forth to reconsider all other options and ask why not, or rather why this. i look forward to next fri, when all my assignments come to an end, and i have an entire day with god under the coconut tree. and renegotiate the contract like the one rooney signed, just that this is a life time contract.

my extended family

2010-10-18T06:12:00.000-07:00

i have wonderful uncles and aunties. even as i say this, i recall many friends telling me bad stories about family rivalry etc. but just minutes ago, my aunt surprisingly sat me down and said she and my uncle wants to pool together the money to send me overseas as an interest free loan. my parents are not exactly well to do; just enough to live comfortably. me and my bro are on study loan; my aunt don't want me to take up any further loans and incur interest. lets hope i get to go exchange.

a tribute to my awesome cg

2010-10-17T09:22:00.000-07:00

Hey Jem
A Big THANK YOU for leading us. This won’t be THE FAREWELL message, but a true appreciation for leading us the past year. For giving your best to us, and for befriending us. For your multiple sms-es for prayer requests despite low response rate. For attempting to know us individually, for offering monetary support when we need. To me, for offering your phone calls in wee hours of the night. I guess i said this before, but i will say it again; it takes great courage and humility for you to apologise to the LG at orchard central that day, and you did it. With this humility and courage, I pray that all will go well with you for your journey with God.
I pray that you will find favour with God and Man. I pray that God will grant you wisdom in planning for your life and bless you the desires of your heart. I pray that you will continue to grow in wisdom and stature, despite you not undertaking any ldrship position. Cos i believe the best form of leadership is leading our own individual lives. And i look forward to the day that your life can and will impact those whom were under you. Cos that is lasting leadership and the best form of gift for us. Jiayou in your work  Rest assured i will call you if i ever go exchange and am penniless overseas. HAHA. I will also inform u first hand if i ever need your ‘help’ cos i believe u will make a great support like how u helped Daniel and Huimei. LOL..
Peter 10’

Rayson
Not exactly a parting shot, since nothing changes between us. Haha. But I really all along wanted to tell you how much I appreciate you and how much you have grown over the past year. I appreciate you for being an awesome friend. Never one to be stingy, your hospitality have exceeded what a normal friend would provide. Thanks Rays. Hope we have not been, and won’t exploit your house too much. Haha.
And i want to say i am really amazed at how much you have grown. I remember there was a night at your old house, while waiting for time to past, you took up your base and started practising and writing chords. I rmb asking how much time you spend and you said this is what you do regularly. Wow. I gotta admit i am not even half as hard working as you in practising my instrument. I am honestly impressed by how skilful you are now. God has indeed blessed you in stature as a musician. And from what i observe, this deliberate effort and passion is the fundamental reason why you have grown. It has benefitted you in many other areas of your life. Compared to the past, you have grown to be more active in building relationship with people. You have grown in knowing how to express yourself, in forging close friendships, and having a stable and consistent walk with God. Indeed, you are someone i can trust to obey and seek God when storms come in your life. I pray that God will continue to expand your influence to the other musios and even in your family. I pray that God will grant the desires of your heart in discipling people before your time is up. And I pray that we will continue to encourage each other with our lives. Jiayou Rayson.
Peter, 10’

Yihui
THANK YOU. Thanks for being a pillar of support in CG. Thanks for sharing to me your concerns or problems esp over the past month. Thanks for studying with me; i certainly benefitted from feeding off your seriousness in studying. And lastly, Thanks for being a friend.
I appreciate your strong walk with God. You always seek to obey the WOG and asking what God’s plan is for you. I believe this heart of obedience has served you well, esp with the recent intern programme that you managed to secure. I pray that all will go well with you in your new CG. Ask, seek and you will receive. So I pray that God will empower you to forge close relationship with your CG members. It certainly won’t be easy, and it certainly is beyond what you can do. But it is definitely possible cause it’s God’s love that will bond you to the rest. Jiayou and have an awesome journey with God. (:
Peter 10’

Lee
Thank You for being an excellent encourager to me. Not verbally, but through your life. Since the ‘auntie eelee’ days to now, your change and growth in God is AMAZING. I learnt alot from how you handled the recent incident. I remember asking you ‘why u still do it despite all the rubbish u r getting?’, your reply is a simple ‘if i don’t do it, who will do it’. It goes to show how big-hearted you are, and how much you love God and Man. Your obedience in Christ has certainly brought you success, esp with you excelling in your studies. Many people have commented how you have a simple faith in God, and I would certainly agree with that.
Your hardwork in practising your instrument has certainly shown in your playing. And God will definitely bless you in your stature as a musician, beyond what you can ever imagine yourself to be. I pray that God will continue to bless you in discipleship, in influencing others, and in setting an exemplary model for the people in your CG to follow. You are important to your CG and future generations of musicians in YWAM. All the best!
Peter 10’

HUIYANG
I guess with every failure comes a lesson leant to make you a better man. I am so proud that you are doing well in your studies and putting in effort. You have grown to be more mature! Haha. Huiyang, I pray that you will remember the times God has helped you and is now helping you through ways you cannot see. God is good, God is real and He loves you. These are simple, but important truths and I pray that you will come to realise and experience it yourself. Nobody can enforce on you, but we can only pray for you continually. And i wanna say that there are alot of people genuinely concerned for you, so YOU ARE NOT ALONE. Rmb, all God requires of you is for you to simply start praying (: I look forward to that day. haha. Be assured our 1v1 match will come soon. Lol.
Peter 10’

Esther Leow.
A Big THANK YOU for being an awesome CG member. This time I mean it. Haha. Thanks for sharing many memories; starting from last time how we celebrated yihui’s bday at reservoir, to studying with u at Mensah, to you offering your Slinky services, and Haunted Changi. I believe there are many more and these moments are what make CG enjoyable for all of us.
I wanna say that your age certainly don’t reflect your maturity. You have showed to us what it means to be God-loving and God-honouring through your life and speech. You have exemplified what it means to have a heart for people; constantly thinking on how you can bring your friends to church. Your life shouts Faith, Love and Child-likeness. This is a Big Plus Point and uniquely you. I pray that you not just keep these characteristics, but further grow and develop them in Christ. You are important to the girls in your new CG, esp the younger believers in terms of spiritual age. You are important to future generations of believers in YWAM. Let not your age hinder you. I am certainly looking forward to you growing to be a Woman Of God. Haha it sure feels weird to affirm u after a year of suaning. But u have certainly made a difference in my life. Jiayou!
Peter, 10’

I think this is the first CG that i can fully enjoy myself and bask in the fellowship, without any worries of planning for CG, stressing over attendance. Perhaps i was still in transition mode in my first YWAM cg. And to be honest, leadership team will naturally operate as a working team. In fact, it's through this freedom from responsibilities that i get to excel and do what i love most, organising informal meet-ups, ensuring care on the ground level, solving problems with fellow cg mates, and knowing each and every one better. And yes, i would say i miss this cg the most.

the S sized shirt.

2010-10-16T09:07:00.000-07:00

i vow never to wear that shirt again until and unless i lose weight. it sure didn't make my day.

anws i had a great shepherd's meet. i think i pon the last two for some reasons, but i made it a point to attend this one. and god answered, bringing me back to certain basic truths. my application point is to ponder on other options i have; so that i won't come to a point where i say 'serve God cos bo pian lor'. and i guess this certainly coincides with my chat with dennis. i was corrected in a seemingly harmless but dangerous comment. 'why not now' was the qtn. half-joking reply was 'dunno why also; cos of church laa'. and for the seemingly eccentric looking dennis, his reply was a firm one: no we shouldn't say bcos of church, but bcos of our own personal beliefs and principles.' yes, bingo! i need to start believing more in wad i claim to believe.

a tiny weeny incident today which is not worth sharing brought me to think abt how i appreciate kaiwen handling the situation few weeks back. during a dinner where both of us were together, he asked if i watched movie (haunted changi) with leow alone. i said and then went ahead to explain it was for my assignment, 2 others i asked din reply and it's dumb to watch a dumb movie alone. i then proceeded to ask a few minutes later why he asked. turned out he heard from someone but he din get the full story until when i explained. i immediately told kai that asking me was a very good move, both for him and me, and i appreciate that. and that's why i would love when issues need to be settled, settle it with the source directly. to me, this takes greater courage and integrity than going around asking other ppl. of cos the flip side is if i did do sth wrong, and i hope if tat ever happens, i will be humble enough to apologise.

wad a day

2010-10-15T09:41:00.000-07:00

wad a day.

-saw the car wreck. it's crazy, shocking, horrendous.
-met the saviour (my long-time neighbour's relative). he genuinely looks good. he will source for spare parts to repair. if cant, he will help us fight for sufficient insurance claim to pay off car loan.
-met dennis at starbucks while studying. turned out to be a one-hour chat that is timely and awesome. god-sent; it answered plenty of queries i have.
-i thought i lost my laptop!! the journey back from amk to meridien was horrible. i never felt so terrible before. seriously felt dizzy from being nervous. thank god it was found. thank god. thanks rayson for helping me search and xiaomao for smses.
-satay with gf, sihan and hx. yes it was a random crowd. but had a good time chatting for an hour plus or so on many things. coupled with two bottles of heinekken, like some uncle. haha. enjoyable nontheless.

yes, wad a day.

any idea on how to be less forgetful? from EZ-link to keys to hp and even my trumpet. shrugs.

happy studying.

2010-10-14T11:47:00.001-07:00

is it what i hope to happen, or issit just a fantasy?
i dunno, may never know, or may find out in due time. (for this matter i'm not refering to studying)

anws i had an awesome time studying just now with da bi.
completed 2 very minor assignments due next wk and completed studying half the content for a test on tues.
it made me happy.
cause as i was doing, i felt surprised. Pleasantly surprised cos it has been some time since i am so concerned with sch work; an unlikely move to study and complete work ahead of time.
a far cry from my A level days, where i always aim the minimal.
but with scoring good grades for the past year, my mechanism naturally aims for more, despite me saying that grades isnt the most impt thing.
i guess maybe now there's added pressure of scoring well to aim for the exchange programme.
but heck, just do my best, and what's in store will just fall in place.

i will know the fate of SGT8166 tmw. it'll be the first time i witness the wreck live. i hope i don't get too stunned or sth.

randomly came across this:
From gaining understanding of others cultures and learning foreign language, to better prepared for job in growing global business world, for having months of excitement and fun, reasons for studying overseas are numerous. With many reasons for studying abroad for semester or school year, it is hard to find reason not to. Benefits of Study abroad include those which can change life. Of course, they will make it little more fun and interesting.

Here is sampling of reasons why studying abroad is something to be considered:

* It is great growth experience – While studying abroad you’ll challenge to live between people unlike you in foreign country. Everyday challenges introduces will cause to be mature, increase self-esteem and confidence, and ultimately make more well-rounded person.
* Gain better understanding of world – While living in foreign country you begins to look yourself within context of greater world around. Seeing ˜big picture’ prompt to question views you have held about unfamiliar and reconsider prejudices and biases.
* Develop foreign language skill – When you are force to use other language to conduct every day business outside class, for example at grocery stores or in restaurant, you will see how easy is to pick language up.
* Increase marketability – Another benefit of study abroad will materialize as seek employment. The employers view all students who studied abroad more respectful of different viewpoints and good position to handle demands of working world with good maturity than peers. And if you are bilingual, that is even better!
* You will be more valuable employee – Studying abroad will continue for you to benefit throughout in career. Borders continued to blur in business world, and the bottom lines become much dependant in foreign relationships, those who all with experience of living abroad will increasingly in higher demand. Those with experience of abroad oftentimes make best candidate for leadership position.

actually, heck about the marketability. i think experience and growth matters most :)

i pray it come true

2010-10-12T09:15:00.001-07:00

MY CLASSMATE ROCKS. she was the first to ask if we singaporeans are eligible for UON's exchange programmes and was successful. she wanted to keep it as a secret as she was afraid of competition but still shared with the few of us today. Did abit of browsing and realised UON's exchange programme is indeed established. Below is a uni i seriously considering after seeing how much they emphasize on receiving exchange students and also offering scholarship programmes. Thier accomodation is also cheap and has 45% of total courses in english. It got me reallyyy excited. And it's a country i least expected to go to. Thank God in their list of recognised australian uni, UON is one of it.

Australia
- Australian National University
- Griffith University
- Macquarie University
- Monash University
- National Korean Studies Center
- Queensland University of Technology
- "The Scholar Ship Macquarie University"
- University of Adelaide
- University of Melbourne
- University of New South Wales
- University of Newcastle
- University of Queensland
- University of Sydney
- University of Western Australia
- Fachhochschule Kufstein Tirol/University of Applied Sciences
- Salzburg University of Applied Sciences
- Technikum Wien

daniel's bachelor nite

2010-10-03T10:38:00.001-07:00

wahahaha.
it is so heart warming to see daniel performing solo at timbre (substation), singing his self-composed proposal song which he will perform again at his church wedding. He literally wowed the audience. makes me wonder... nvm... haha. and i got to seat gmax with daniel... o god, his alr white face turned whiter. haha. it is really scary, esp the going down part when i literally plunged face down. my heart almost came out thru my mouth.

THE week has passed with great results. Symph band on stage was wonderful based on feedbacks i ask from ppl. Before the next one could be planned, i alr hav two new ppl whom i have in mind to stage them. new blood, freshness, new growth. Hopekids drama was a blast, the biggest ever in its history i think. I believe it cld hv been better, but in the process i do learn plenty; bout being responsible, spirit of excellence etc etc.

now the focus is shifted to daniel's wedding. all for my friend whom i hv known since sec2.

the 2 sacred weekends

2010-10-01T10:38:00.000-07:00

the time has finally come. this weekend is a big one for me. next weekend an even bigger one. i pray for success.

my 5 mentors.

2010-09-28T10:14:00.001-07:00

Just finished a one full hour jog with jiehui in the middle of the nite. made me realise how much i thank God for ppl in my life. i realise who are the ones i can count on, talk to, and appreciate. when i was asked yst if i am coping well with irregular shepherding, i said yes, cos of the support i have. Other than friends i have, Daniel, Gideon, Jiehui, Hongteck, Jem all play significant roles in my life.
For Daniel, his simplicity and genuine heart for God cannot be put into words. It is best learned thru modelling and he has done that for 8 years of my life. When my time comes, he'll be the model to learn from on how to win a girl's heart. hahaha.
Gi's wisdom is second to none. apart from most the times when he gets bullied, i have learned so much from the serious talk that we have.
Jiehui is an excellent male ldrship to model from. He inspires thru actions.
Every meet up with Hongteck is over coffee. And every meet-up is greatly treasured. not the typical ra-ra ldr, i appreciate his strong and firm desire to learn and lead.
Jem is the ldr i argue with the most. literally argue. but yes, at least he is someone i no need to think twice abt sharing wadever i need to unload. i guess we are best suited being friends instead.
Thank God for u guys.

this comin sun.

2010-09-27T11:28:00.000-07:00

i am growing increasingly frustrated by the hopekids drama. i gotta admit last sun's preview for children's day service was poorly done. but maybe the starting point is different. i want to make this whole process fun and memorable. in the previous drama i acted, rehs were a chore and it was just 'act and go' for the actual event. i want the actors to enjoy each other's company and the process of rehs. and i do think the rehs this time round were very enjoyable. but i guess with fun, the tiny whiny details are overlooked. maybe it's my working style. it obviously clashes with hers. that said, i do see and learned the point of being excellent. perhaps this is to prepare me for the real world where nonsense is not tolerated. forget about working style etc etc, lets just do it and bring joy to the kids this sunday.

i din know dance can be fun, esp for first-time learners like us.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UMaIXSIPl4U

OCH

2010-09-22T07:47:00.000-07:00

old changi hospital that is.
watched it to complete my movie review assignment.
lets just say... it's cheap and senseless thrill.
thanks ah leow for accompanying me. i really think i will be bored to death watching such a movie alone.
all's is going well, hopekids reh have been very fun, esp with the amatuer us learning dance moves from cher, a dancer in youth.
and yes, still praying for an awesome and fruitful 3 weeks ahead.

busy busy

2010-09-19T08:54:00.000-07:00

busy busy week. what we thought was due on thurs turns out to be tmw nite. it caught all my friends by surprise. it's a movie review and i haven't even caught the movie. doing so tmw. first time watching a movie. shrugs.
two drama rehersals for hopekids on mon/tues, band reh on fri, throw in the 3 tuition slots and d2 assignments by end week, my mind is alr loaded at the thought of it. Nvm, follow lee's advice, complete one thing at a time.
results for last sem's back. i did well. in fact, surpass my expectations yet again. i took it easy for law and business mod, hoping at least a credit will suffice. but heck, both scored well. 3D & 1HD. yes, i am proud to score well. firstly to exorcise the ghosts of A levels and secondly to do mmy mum proud. good job to myself. haha. but i guess the main thing is still to enjoy studying, give my best, cont to depend on God and enjoy life.
i pray for this hectic month to be a breakthru month for me.

BGR in hopekids

2010-09-15T07:51:00.000-07:00

In God's word of the day for the previous hopekids service, aka sermon, the kids were taught on 'How to handle the pressure of BGR'. The whole point HT was trying to bring across was responsibility.
During CG when i was discussing with them, i got varied responses. One said 'i hate girls'. Another said 'No need for them'. Well well, wait till the pressure really hits home. haha. 'but yes, i told them: 'cannot avoid girls, must make good female friends too, cos heard of the phase yr wife is yr best friend?' why din anyone tell me this when i was stuck in a boys school for 10 years? lol.
The three points are
1) know God has the best timing
2) focus on the best thing now
3) build the best for the future
Simple truths.

how to slim down

2010-09-13T09:30:00.001-07:00

Oftentimes people mistake thirst for hunger pains (the body gets about 20% of the water it needs from the food you eat). Try drinking plenty of water with your meal and after if needed. That'll probably help with the hunger pains.

PLEASE eat breakfast. It gets your metabolism going after its long break without food. The reason why you're more hungry during the day after a large breakfast is because you filled your stomach up too much. If you fill yourself full or to 'bursting' your brain gets trained to think that it HAS to be that full all the time. Start with what amanda said. Eat a small breakfast, then a snack between it and lunch.

The key for a lot of people is to eat BEFORE you get hungry, then you won't want to binge. Eat small frequent meals if possible.

If that isn't possible, try to fill up on comlex carbs, veggies and fruit. Protein is also a great fuel, but you have to be careful because it can also be high in saturated fats, calories and sodium.

taken from a google search of 'why am i always hungry'... hahaha.

life lessons.

2010-09-12T08:43:00.000-07:00

i learned a lesson or two for the past few days.

at the 'build n splash' event on fri, it was very very memorable for me. firstly was how the 400 odd parents and kids alike enjoyed themselves. at the station where i was in charge, the skeptical me was yet agn taken aback when nearly all parents and kids enthusiastically challenged at the station where an entire family, tied together using string, had to leopard crawl on rubbish bags with soap water. seeing how they bonded and did the many other challenges together blessed me tremendously. thruout most of the challenges, i followed hongteck's family ard cos they had 2 kids visitors, a pri2 and pri6 siblings. they were actually kids under a counselling case; the elder brother had alr skipped sch for a long time. but they are well-behaved kids who dont look anything of tat sort. i guess the problem goes beyond just behavioural. what touched me was nearing the end of the challenges, aft hongetck and them had successfully built a big sandcastle by the beach, the p6 kid told me in his own words "i never had such fun for a long time". thumbs up hopekids!

my patience was severely tested during the foam shower. i was standing at one side observing the kids when thanks to kim, she shouted to the 20 kids "grab teacher peter and bring him inside!". i had two choice, forcefully fend them off, or just 'ok let them be'. kids being kids, they literally dragged me by my shirt and hurled the foam all over my face. ouch. but at that moment, i would have to admit i enjoyed myself in the presence of these little ones. aft that, one of my p6 kids, while i was throwing foam back at her, grabbed my specs and squashed it with both her hands! i could feel the force she exerted. gosh specs are ex if u know wad i mean. i think miraculously, god saved my specs and nth happpened to it.

again today, while doing bus duty, this p1 kid who saw me wearing a crocs white loafer just out of the blue stepped on both my shoes. i was stunned to be honest. almost snapped when i saw black shoe prints on it. firstly it was white. secondly it is CROCS!! (ex leh). i took a deep breath, 'ok let it go'. went to him, told him it's wrong and dont do it again, and asked 'what should u say?'. and yes, he said sorry. i guess anger is a choice, esp towards kids. we will always be on the losing end, but isnt tat what sacrifice is abt? it's more impt to tell them their mistakes, make sure they learn, than to snap and get angry at them. but god, i pray you reduce these heart attack moments.

came back from a 2-table zi char dinner to celebrate my uncle's bday that cost abt 500 bucks. what i enjoyed most was not the food tho, but the mere presence of family members laughing and cracking jokes with the smaller kids, and me being able to catch up with my niece and some others. i think i am beginning to get what it means by blood is thicker than water. i missed out alot on family time for the past decade, i wont attribute the main reason to church, but the fact that little emphasis was taught or placed in my life. blood family, as much as spiritual family, is given and blessed by God too. hoping for things to improve from now.

lastly, have been trying to think deeper why i am so keen on teaching. it's somewhat confirmed that i am good at this, and most imptly being fulfilled aft most of my tuition classes, hopekids cg session etc. hopefully i can gain deeper insights on why is that the case, dream big and align this passion to any of god's plans that may come.

happy birthday mr choo.

2010-09-09T12:18:00.001-07:00

the skeptical me thought few would respond in going all the way down to jem's hse to celebrate. But heck, 11 went in all; our two drivers willingly travelled half of sg to send ppl home. It was a great time, good fun and a blessing. Thanks for proving me wrong. and i got to drive too. haha.

The skeptical me again thought tmw's hopekids event at OBS is just another kids outing. But heck, i just opened the attendance list and saw 300 over parents and kids signing up. It goes to show how much effort hongteck and team have put into reaching out to kids and partnering their family. Thanks for proving me wrong again. Yes, i will go and serve with a smile.

strong- yes, no?

2010-09-06T08:50:00.000-07:00

i am not as strong as i think and hope i am.

anws, yeah i've decided to park my savings with the church. at least till my aussie trip if it pulls thru.

as i am writing affirmations for jem, it frustrates me to think how ppl can say they are too busy to write or that there are simply too many ppl's birthday in a month. the equation is simple, 5 mins of youtubing or googling every nite can be translated into replying the email on the spot. At least that is what i have been doing for every of such email. perhaps it still disappoints me that some ppl whom i wish would write for me didnt. who doesnt like being affirmed? face it, it is laziness. haha.

The right man

2010-09-05T03:33:00.000-07:00

Da-bi sent this email and i guess she was excited about finding 'him' aft reading this based on the tone of her words. hahaha. I read and i guess it's an awesome checklist for me myself.

The Right Man

First, we must allow our Heavenly Father to do the picking. And second, the decision for a mate must be made on a spiritual and intellectual basis before it's made on an emotional one. "What about love? Shouldn't that be the third? you ask. No, and I'll tell you why. "The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it? (Jer. 17:9). The heart is willful and is driven by its own agenda. It does not consider things rationally and intelligently - it just loves to love!

Therefore you have to point it in the right directions: " Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life" (Prov.4:23). Whenever you meet a man, you need to get clearance from God, check out his attributes, and then allow your heart to engage.

Dating exists not for mating; it exists for collecting data. I believe that the biblical design would be friendship, courtship and then marriage. Friendship is two people walking together in agreement and accountability, learning and growing together. Courtship follows the mutual agreement to commit to one another exclusively - it is the decisive turning toward the agreed-upon goal of the marriage altar. It is a period of laying a foundation and preparing your life together after marriage.

But dating?

Well, if you do date, use the time wisely to gather facts: Check out the fabric. Is the person mate material? Does this man have an intimate relationship with the Father through Jesus Christ? Does he care what God thinks about his behavior? Is he accountable to God as well as another co-laborer in the faith? Accountability is an important factor. It is imperative to maintaining a committed relationship. Is your potential spouse a member of the same family - the family of God? Scripture is clear on this: "Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?" (2 Cor 6:14). You need to have common interests and values and agree on the essentials of living day to day. You have a similar spiritual walk. You eat the same spiritual diet. You enjoy a lot of similar things. You have like interests, like goals in life, like opinions on basic life issues. You have had like experiences in your background. Though there is some truth to the idiom that opposites attract, like-minded folks fare better together. Furthermore, does he want to get married? If you want to be married and your dreamboat isn't interested, don't waste your time. Remember, women fall in love and get married. Men decide to get married and then look for a wife. Note the difference in order. So if a guy says he's not looking for anything serious, take his words seriously. If he's not going in your direction, get off the bus & wait for the right one.

2. Does this man want you? Is he pursuing you? The man who is right for
you will pursue you, and God's hand in the relationship will be clear. No
guessing, no fleeces, no dead ends. Scripture says: "He who finds a wife
finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord" (Prov. 18:22). Note -
who finds whom? THE MAN FINDS THE WIFE.

From the beginning of time, God has transported men & women across the
world in order to put them together. At the RIGHT TIME, He will bring that
man on the scene and he will find you. In God's perfect design, the man is
the one who recognizes his mate

Adam has no problem recognizing that Eve was his missing rib. You do not
need to strategically place yourself anywhere. You don't have to help a guy
out because he's shy! Men will do whatever they have to do to get what they
truly want. The man in your life should recognize you as the pearl of great
price in his life and be willing to do whatever he must in order to gain
your hand. If he is passive about gaining your affections, take it as a
sign that he is not interested.

Many a woman's mother has suggested that it is a good idea to marry a man
who loves you more than you love him. As cold as that sounds, it actually
might be scriptural if you stop to think about it: "We love him because he
first loved us" (1 Jn 4:19). Until then, take the ultimate chill pill. You
don't need a bunch of men in your life to make you feel all right about
yourself. You need only one man your man, the one God has selected to
select you. And trust me, the right man at the wrong time can be just as
awful as the wrong man at any time. So trust God's timing in this. He is
the ultimate matchmaker. Relax, sit pretty and allow yourself to be found!

Again - WAIT until the man voices his intentions. He should take the lead
in establishing the relationship. You may have an inkling that he is the
one, but God will use the man to set the tone of the relationship. Allow
him the opportunity to woo you - this is your first act of submission.
Jesus set the standard for all men to follow. They should love us first .
And they should lead the relationship.

3. The man in your life should not desire to move into your house, only
into your heart. A man who prepares for your future has made his intentions
clear. A man who is husband material has the means to take care of a wife.
He is a responsible human being who understands he needs to have something
to offer. In short, a man should have the means to be a suitable lover for
you.

4. Check out his buddies. Everyone knows birds of the same feather flock
together, yet most women fail to see the connection between a man and his
friends. A man's pals tell you a lot about the person that you haven't seen
yet. They reveal things about the guy's character that might be hidden when
he is on good behavior. Everyone knows how to put his best foot forward.
Don't stay focused on the foot, check out the rest of the body!

5. Check out his relationship with his mother. How does he treat her? This
is your preview of how he will treat you. There are lots of men who,
because of a negative relationship with their mothers, really don't like
women, yet say they do. Unresolved issues between mother and son continue
between husband and wife.

6. Remember that a man's family reveals the cloth from which he's cut.
Take note and decide whether you want your future with the man in your life
to look like his present family situation.

7. Check out the patterns of his life. Do you see repeated cycles of drama
in his personal kingdom? broken relationships? problems in making
commitments? including the job market? mood swings? Is a problem always
someone else's fault? Does he embrace responsibility or shirk it? Does he
keep his promises? Is he a man of good reputation? Remember all garments
look wonderful hanging in the store, but with wear, some begin to unravel.
Give yourself time and space to check out the man in your life. Time will
always reveal whether or not he is made of the right stuff.

8. Does this man have a vision for his life? Is he running with that
vision? Remember, God decided Adam needed help once Adam got busy DOING his assignment. As we saw Adam, a man doesn't need help until he is busy doing
what he was created and called to do. Is the man in your life guided by
sense of destiny and purpose, or does he just allow life to happen around
him? A man who is not certain of his mission can be a most miserable person
- and you'll be miserable too if you know where YOU want to go in life. A
man who has vision is not intimidated by a woman whose mission statement is
clear. He will be your best ally, cheerleader and assistant because he
wants you both to make it! A man who cannot be supportive of your
achievements because he is floundering in a sea of uncertainty over his own
life is not a healthy partner to have and to hold forever. Creating
dependencies or feelings of obligation is not the way to get the best out
of your man. Somewhere along the way, he will resent you and flee from the
smothering burden of obligation he associates you with. You want a man who
is firmly anchored in his identity in Christ.

Remember, we are looking for a man who will be priest and leader of his home. His first instinct should be to want to cover you, redeem you, and provide for you. Your job is to decide if this is the man God has ordained for you to complement.

9. Complementary. Do your talents and gifts complement his? Do his gifts
complement yours? What about your temperaments? Do you see the two of you
as an effective team capable of bringing blessing to the lives of those
around you? Do your futures mesh? Can you coordinate your gifts in an
attractive and effective way? This is why knowing your purpose is so
important. Make sure your hearts beat for mutual causes. When I go shopping
I always consider the fabric, the fit and what I already have in my closet.
Will my next purchase be a complementary addition to what I already have?

If I find that I am going to have to buy shoes and matching accessories to
go with a new outfit, I leave it right on the rack. It is too expensive a
proposition.

If the man you meet makes you feel that you need to completely reinvent
yourself, something is wrong. This is where I ask you to consider the
relationship in terms of cost. Is this relationship expensive spiritually?
emotional or physically? Does your longing for a mate make you willing to
forfeit who you are in the process? Or does he see you as the gift that you
are?

The man in your life should consider you a rare find, a priceless
jewel-because of you he is getting ready to get blessed big-time!

Any relationship that causes you to feel unworthy, unlovely, unacceptable,
undesirable or that you have to work for love, is too expensive! God has
called the man to cover, protect and provide not only materially for a
woman, but emotionally and spiritually as well. You should be richer in
mind, body and spirit for your union with the man of your dreams. The man
in your life should make rich deposits into your heart and spirit, not
withdrawals.

10. Does he have a healthy love & acceptance of himself? Make sure the
man in your life has taken time to heal from past relationships and has
made peace with himself. How he cares for himself is how he will care for
you. A man's relationship with God is crucial here. His love for himself
will only be as strong as his love for God. This is not something that you
can impart. You cannot be his savior or teacher. That is out of spiritual
order.

In his rightful place as your personal priest, he should be leading you to
a richer relationship with Christ. If he is causing you to compromise your
Faith and destabilize your walk, if he is leading you into sexual sin or
Causing you to be distracted from your commitment to Christ, the
Relationship is too expensive. Offending the Lover of your soul, who
Promises you eternal love, is too high a fare to pay for a ride that has a
Limited run.

If you and your man can't soar in the Spirit, when the force
of your love for another is tested by the pull of gravity of the world,
Your union will not be able to survive.

So you decide.

How much is your life worth? How much is your love worth?
You will be able to accept only what you believe you deserve.

God himself calculated the worth of your love and decided it was worth His life.

He now pledges you His love for eternity. Yes, Jesus sets the example for all others to follow when He paid
a ransom for His bride. Should you expect less from a mortal man?
Throughout the Biblical age, men were willing to pay the cost for the hand
that they desired. The truth of the matter is, everyone knows that anything
worth having, costs. And no one gets a ride in this life for free.

Our prayer:

Dear Heavenly Father,
I confess that I have not always been as careful as I should've been with
my heart. From time to time, my desire for love has caused me to leave my
heart in the wrong hands. I now commit my heart into Your hands for
safekeeping. Please help me to stop being so impulsive with what You deem
so precious. As I learn to celebrate Your love for me, let me learn from
Your example what a bridegroom should really be like. Help me to never
settle for less than what You desire for me. As I embrace You as the Lover
of my soul, keep my affections in the haven of Your own heart. As I rest in
Your love, make me more discriminating of those who approach me. I ask that
You take over this area of my life. Keep me from those You know would hurt
my heart. I invite You to set a hedge around me and keep me from all who
would draw me into unfruitful relationships until the day you present me to
the mate that You have selected for me. Grant me the discernment to
recognize him as he recognizes me. Cleanse me from the temptation to
typecast the men I meet according to what I see. Help me to trust in Your
knowledge and lean not on my own understanding. I know that You know what
is best for me; therefore I yield to Your choice.

-Author undisclosed

Warmest regards,
JONK(:

Arise concert

2010-09-04T09:00:00.000-07:00

i attended this kids praise and worship concert at expo last month. what touched me were 5 year old kids taking the mic and sharing what God had spoken to them. The first said she saw mountains. When asked what it means, she said mountains means grace. She said God loves me and you. Another 5 year old said: "God spoke to me that God will take care of me. He is going to give me something." I copied those words down in my notepad. What amazed me was the simple and child-like faith. What they shared are no brainer points even for non believers. But, do we still believe in those simple truths?

comex 2010

2010-09-03T22:07:00.000-07:00

i was amazed at how huaxiang bargains. it's awesome. collectively, we bought a games controller for $5 down from $8, and a wireless mouse for $15 down from $20. he also got a iphone holder at exactly half price for $5 down from $10. ok u get the point. go shop with him the next time and u will know wad i mean. i also got a brothers monolaser printer for $98. No more excuses not to do readings or print out lecture slides. haha. another thing i learn, go 'shopping' with ppl of equal or better stamina, it sure makes the 4 hrs worthwhile no matter how tiring it is.

school term has been a slow start... argh... i need to buck up.. and delete garena from my com... hahaha...

sept 2010

2010-08-29T09:42:00.000-07:00

choke choke. i realised what a heavy month i have. symph band on 2oct ss, directing children's day ss on 3 oct, that means 2 rehs per week; and first bout of assignments due that very week too. i need to at least complete my assignments by 3rd week, a mega challenge considering how last min i am. and i also trying to arrange parts for a worship for the very first time. but beneath these, i guess being busy is better than slacking. at least it keeps me occupied and tough times draw u closer to the one u need to draw strength from i guess.

authencity

2010-08-27T09:43:00.001-07:00

it has been a heavy week. despite all the chiongness, something in me is bugging. a need to change perhaps? i spent the past 48 hrs purely slacking and chionging; winning e at cong's hse at noon, durian last nite, overnite winning e again at wal's, bishan chixricce, and gideon's bday celebration a while ago. it's perhaps during these times tat my mind is left to drift on its own that i get to reflect sonme things that ive not done well, or rather, not satisfied with. more so aft my hour long skype with prajitna, it just came out wout me delibrately wanting to tell him. perhaps, yes, it's something that god is tugging at. a question just popped into my head half an hr ago: am i an authentic christian? i can serve powerfully, preach big, love generously, acquire immense knowledge, have many friends, but wad does it mean to be an authentic christian?

the day wout friends

2010-08-25T10:09:00.000-07:00

i cant seem to spend a day alone can i? since the start of last week, even tho its exams week, i still had to study with ppl like esther. Even when exams ended, it's non-stop hits for me. Fri nite: dim sum buffet, sat nite: winning e overnite, sun: kids concert, mon: lunch+gaming+steamboat+overnite winning e, tues: cg lunch+tuition, wed: lunchwjem+tuition+jogsupperwjiehuipotato. hahaha. xiong arh. like wad jontay always said, such our liver will dry up as a result of such chionging. Finally a nite to take a breather. A day tmw to chill. possibly at cong's hse. Makes me wonder, how do i survive in aussie if i ever do make it there? guess jesus will really be my best friend den.

anwes, i am looking forward to a jam packed month. Oct 2 is the symph band up on youth ss, oct 3 is the hopekids children's day where im handling drama, and next week is sch start! die. but die in God's hands. lol.

hopekids exam pack

2010-08-16T07:27:00.000-07:00

Thanks Swee Keat for asking the pick up from dad. Haha it sure saved alot of time and inconvenience esp since it was raining rather heavily. We both went to four kids' houses to pass them exam packs, since it is their prelims week. Perhaps the most memorable one was Natalie's house, where her face lit up when she saw us. She was alone watching TV, with her parents working and brother in studentcare when we entered her house. Watching her pray earnestly together with us for her prelims made all the effort worthwhile. Thankfully the pickup wasnt anything near church truck standard, esp that the heavy traffic almost killed my feet, having to maintain half clutch for countless minutes. LOL. anws it was truly enjoyable for 3 reasons; i get to drive, the kids were blessed, and both of us were blessed as well.

SEM 4 timetable

2010-08-13T10:01:00.000-07:00

MON
CMNS2290
L: 9am - 10am
T(C2) 1.15pm - 3.15pm

TUES
ECON1002
L: 9am - 11am
T(C1, C2) 11.15am - 12.15pm

THURS
MNGT2001 (Grp C2 & C3)
Lect: 9am - 11am
T(C2, C3) 11.15am - 12.15pm

CMNS2280
T(C2) 1pm - 3pm

YEEEHAAAA.... I'm in tutorial C2... which means a 3 day week... SHIOK.

This sem's timetable tat just passed was very sucky... really thank god for this new timetable... =)

a conversation with huiyang n esther

2010-08-08T11:29:00.001-07:00

huiyang says:
haha esther joke sia
she ask me how come i nv come ess
den i say i working
den she ask wad i working as
den i say u see my dp ah that one rocket launcher shoot rocket like firework
then she say for sch or yog
actually that thing on my dp is a f0llowspot aka bigtorchlight to shine on people on stage

huiyang just sent you a nudge.

wanggg says:
hahaha!

estherleow. has been added to the conversation.

wanggg says:
hey
esther
huiyang says:
oi
i nv tell u hor
wanggg says:
its not rocket launcher
huiyang says:

wanggg says:
it is a HUMAN CATAPULT!
huiyang says:
die
lol
wanggg says:
boom!
estherleow. says:
hahahahahahha
HUIYANG YOU DIE
wanggg says:
BOOM!
huiyang says:
no la
u know ure bdae
wanggg says:
BOOM BOOM!
huiyang says:
dun haf any stupid conversation
so today
we found one
LOL
wanggg says:
HAHAHA
estherleow. says:
stupid!!
ahaha

a wonderful nite out with LG

2010-08-07T09:40:00.000-07:00

this is wad i sms ed them:
Thanks for making time out. I enjoyed it very much, the food was fatabulous, THE CARD finally arrived, the shirt gifts are very much appreciated, and most importantly the fellowship was great! I gotta say it's one of the more memorable celebrations in recent years cause these are wad i really enjoy. Thanks again my friends.

yep, my LG really met all my needs: Good, cheap italian food at Liang Court, affirmation cards, paid for my shopping at G2000 and enjoyable fellowship. These are the simple things in life that i enjoy. No need to be expensive food or branded gifts. Just effort that comes from the heart.

Perhaps the proudest thing i feel abt my LG nw is how this new guy Daniel loves hanging out with us. I don't think it's a matter of comparing which group is better (cos he is not comfortable his assigned shepherd in another gp etc), but as i was reflecting back just nw, i think the greatest sign of success an LG should have is whether it attracts outsiders like Daniel. And i can safely say he is indeed enjoying himself with us. I think only an LG that loves God and each other can be attractive. Well done LG mates.

Also thanks Jloh for organising the JB trip, tog with debbie, shar, cheng, fatboy and friend. I treasured the small moments of catch up with each of them and I love all of their company esp as some of them are my closer friends.

Thanks eevoon for yr book. i promised to sms her aft reading it. that will force me to really read it. haha. Thanks huiyang for asking me out for bday treat next wk.

Lastly, i really thank God that hosting pulled thru. It was 5 times better than yst's rehersal. Tho first service was quite low atmosphere, i heeded gi's advice to just let go and give it all, and turned out second service was a blast. Thank you God, you are indeed faithful. time to crack brain for the second ss hosting. continuing to depend on Him!

pi

2010-08-06T09:58:00.000-07:00

this morning was a miracle. i started on my 1.5k essay last nite... rested at 2am at 900 word mark and contemplated sleeping till 5am to finish up cos i was really typing rubbish... i gave up tat idea cos it never ever worked in my life... but while resting i actually fell asleep and did manage to wake up at exactly 5.30am! and this wout any alarm! when i woke up, my first thought was, God thank you. Successfully finished the essay by 7, napped for an hour b4 heading to sch. phew.

today's reh was mixed feelings. The musical rocks, and i managed to play my parts well i think. but the hosting was cui to say the least, the acting+hosting fusion din seem to work out well. for a moment i felt so cui ... perhaps it was a lack of concrete hosting script or just pure lack of experience...

actually this made me wonder seriously how come so cui... in fact i successfully fasted thruout the week for pi ss and my hosting... this caused me to do some deep evaluation on myself... perhaps i was over confident that this will turn out smoothly, just bcos i fasted. and this attitude is in fact wrong to begin with! so on my way home, i have re-scripted the entire hosting, rehearsed over the phone with jon js nw, and hopefully it will turn out wonderful tmw.

paint ball

2010-08-04T08:43:00.001-07:00

Hi Peter, happy birthday to you. You are indeed precious to God and to me. Your presence in our church family means a lot to me. Keep walking closely with Jesus as He is totally good. Enjoy your day! - fb msg by pj.

this came so unexpected. i am trying not to act like i'm star-struck... but... i am! hahaha. yes i will.

My niece constance did the nicest thing ever, she called to wish me happy birthday. haha... damn sweet laa...

going for paint ball with friends (despite nursing a sprained ankle)! wanna publicly thank JLOH for painstakingly organising it. hahaha. ouch, i hope it dont leave any permanent damage or scar on me.

the dumb me

2010-08-02T10:00:00.000-07:00

i felt like a joke just nw. went to support derek for his TJC and alumni concert. The smart alec me simply assumed it to be a school brass band concert and that it would be a grand affair since it's held at esplanade. I messaged a few others of the band players asking them to come support derek. To the most shocking of discoveries, the concert was held in the recital studio (abt 200 seater which was half-filled) and when i entered, there lies a grand piano in the middle of the performance stage. Where are all the seats for the band players? I immediately sensed sth so wrong, i took out the programme list and when i saw that most the songs were of classical names, tat's it. I got it all wrong. Turned out to be a fusion of mainly piano recital, a brass quintet, guzheng and some random chinese instruments performances. Thank God only Celestine went, i simply looked at her and laughed the entire performance at how dumb i am. nontheless, it's for derek ya... so...

came back from a last min supper with some of the NS dudes. Foo, potato, hy, jiehui, shijie, luke, zac, yinglin and victor. they mini-celebrated my birthday with this treat and a ice-cream from the prata shop. hahaha thanks dudes. I really really thank God that i was from NS group. It just feels great hanging out with them. Altho time doesnt permit us from catching up and knowing each other deeper, i know that those two years tog is strong and meaningful bcos of the bond we share. And i really look forward to serving God with these friends in the future!

Grace

2010-07-31T10:00:00.001-07:00

Just returned from FOP. It was a great experience, altho i spent most of the time observing and soaking in the atmosphere more than actually praising and worshipping. Love doen moen lots; simple no frills worship coupled with meaningful lyrics. And boy did he manage to win people's hearts. As i was walking back, over heard two different groups of youths talking abt him, :'it is doen moen who impacted...'. I hope i am not being biased or self-righteous abt this, but i really believe there must be greater balance between good music and true worship. or maybe i belong to the old era.

wanted to blog this brochure from daily bread:
The trouble with grace is that it can be misunderstood and misused to bring out the worst in us. Case study: in OT, ppl have to sacrifice animals etc to atone, what a hassle! i believe they will think twice b4 sinning. i always simply make the same prayer aft sinning, 'God forgive me and help me to change'. Too easy a way out?

The good thing abt grace is that it can bring out the best in us. Grace can lift the spirits and character of anyone who discovers how much they need it, how free is it, and how ready God gives to those who humble before Him.

One of the most wonderful revelations of the bible is that we dont have to wonder whether the existence of such undeserved kindness is too good to be true. We alr owe our salvation to underserved grace anws!

next week is exciting cos it's my bday! hahaha... nah... it is challenging cos i just decided to fast everyday (except thurs) till 5pm till pi services over. o gosh, o god, save me! scold me if u catch me eating!

a prayer

2010-07-26T11:27:00.000-07:00

I sing a love song to You Lord
Every day, every night
Tell of Your goodness and mercy
Tell the world how You rescued me
Picked me up, from sin and shame
Your breath gives me new life

Where can I go from Your presence
Under Your wings I take refuge
Your Spirit lives within my heart
I know, we’ll never be apart

Everyday, I draw closer to You Lord
I long to see Your face
And hide in Your embrace
All my life, dwelling in Your holy place
My heart O Lord You’ve changed
I’ll never be the same

This song aptly describes my prayer for this season.

b-d-a-y

2010-07-25T21:46:00.000-07:00

can i shamelessly list out my bday wish list lest you wonder wad to get... haha

i need a bag with a laptop compartment. a bagpack preferably. carrying the laptop case by itself is causing great inconvenience.

while walking down orchard road and taking pics for my sch assignment, i 'stolled' into G2000 and spent a good one hour there trying out blazers, jackets and vest. Bought a vest at 50% discount in the end. But i hope to buy more shirts for casual wear (i think i look slimmer in them) and maybe a jacket for the upcoming weddings. bring me there to shop!

nth beats friends and fellowship =) makeup class falls on next thurs, which i intend to pon and go JB... hmm...

flaws within perfection

2010-07-25T21:09:00.000-07:00

why will jloh comment to me that she heard yihui's bday celebration on tues was cui-ed? what has it got to do with her? i am totally not blaming her, but rather the ppl that told her. If it's cui, den do sth abt it! dont just talk and talk and talk. we like to talk abt others when the conversation topics dry up. we like to justify the line between 'sharing' and 'gossiping'. Jloh knowing it wont make a heck of a difference to anything. i think i am biased, cos i dont even know the context of what exactly was said. call me hao-lianing, but aft i heard wad happened on tues, my instinct was to do a good one for my cg member. I asked for ideas from fatboy and tat's how the fish spa came abt. stop gossiping ppl! irritated.

anws, basketball last nite was AWESOME. abt 15 people from all over yhope, including marcus, sunny, wal, kai, rays, raph, fatboy etc etc. heard tat some who nvr attend service for some time came to play as well. was telling gideon this is a fantastic avenure for sporty ppl to gather and unleash our inner man. haha. assignments seem to be going fine. my first ever self-made video doc is half-done. looking forward to the end of this sem!

2010-07-24T10:38:00.000-07:00

just returned from yihui bday celeb; fish spa and K! omg the fish spa was a truly nerve wrecking experience. we successfully scamed yihui while she was blinded into believing that her legs were in a pond of prawns. but end up i was the lousiest, screaming and shouting cos it was realli too itchy. as for the K, i think my singing improved. hahaha.

anws bracing myself for a hectic 3-weeks ahead. it will mark the end of my sem. i will be surprised to score as well as last sem cos honestly, i nvr put in as much effort as before. blame it on world cup and those crazy late nites. ok blame it on my complacency den.

putting in effort to prepare hopekids cg teaching now at this crazy hour. honestly i feel guilty and also inspired that my co cls are so much more serious in giving their best. considering the fact i woke up at 730am for a jog w jiehui and alvin, i pray that i will last the hopekids session, jamming, movie, bball and an interview assignment, all in a single day.